


Different Can Be Better

by Reifromspace



Category: Camp Camp (Web Series)
Genre: Acceptance, Alternate Universe - Trans, Alternate Universe- David Adopts Max, David is trans, FTM, Gen, Love, M/M, Maxvid shippers I dont care that shit is digusting stay the fuck away, SO MUCH FLUFF, There won’t be underage in this fic at all ya nasty fucks, Trans David, Trans Max, dadvid, family fluff too, first crush fluff, following Max over a couple years, lots of fluff, mtf, updated daily
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-11
Updated: 2019-02-11
Packaged: 2019-03-16 13:36:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 34
Words: 40,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13637325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reifromspace/pseuds/Reifromspace
Summary: David ropes Jasper into working at the camp for the summer and he quickly realizes what his boyfriend loves so much about the kid named Max.





	1. Haircuts

**Author's Note:**

> I know this isn't my usual fic, and I don't intend to update this one like my usual one so we'll see how often this one gets updated.

Jasper had never been one for camp Campbell but they were short staffed and his boyfriend had practically begged him to come this year. So he did. Because he was a sucker for that fine lipped pout the redhead could accomplish so well. When they arrived at camp it was just as shit as he remembered, somehow it was still standing though he wasn’t sure how.

He’d noticed Max right away, he was the first to arrive, dropped off in a cab by himself. David always told the most stories about Max rather than any other camper and it wasn’t until halfway through the second week did Jasper understand why.

“You think he might feel like you did?” Jasper asked as they lay together quietly one night in the councilors cabin, Gwen snoring in the other half of the room. 

Jasper felt the others fingers curling around his hair, tightening and then letting go of curls, a move he loved the other to do. “Yeah…” the man trailed off looking down. “But I don’t know how to approach them about it?” He said honestly.

Jasper slid his arm around his lover's waist pulling him closer peppering little kisses over his freckles. “Leave it to me okay?” He stroked the others cheek.

“What are you going to do?” He watched the wonder fill those gleaming emerald eyes.

“Just don’t be mad… but I’ve got a plan to push him over to you… if it’s okay the campers know your secret.” David nodded, of course, he was okay with it, he would openly talk about it if he thought it was something the campers would care about.

“Alright, tomorrow I’m going to let it slip on purpose around him.” The understanding that dawned on his lovers faces brought a brilliant smile to his.

“Okay, that’s gonna be really awkward… it’s been a while so I’m not sure I’ll remember to react.” He laughed and they settled in for the night.

_________________________________

At breakfast was too busy, but when they started out on the hiking trip it would be a little easier. Gwen took the lead with most of the campers, Jasper in the middle and David took up the rear with Max, about halfway through Jasper came jogging back. “Delilah!” He cried and then stopped mid step. “Ah shit, that was… I’m sorry David.” He pointedly pronounces the name as David faltered, it felt weird being called that name after more than a decade. 

“J-Jas it’s okay that’s okay it happens.” He let out an awkward laugh

“Delilah? Who the fuck is Delilah?” The boy in the blue hoodie looked up at David with a deep frown. 

“There’s another girl here?” Nikki asked peeking up and looking around.

“No, no kids it was just a mistake I made,” Jasper said quickly waving his hands.

Neil looked between Jasper and David skeptically for a long moment before shouting it. “David’s trans?”

There was a flash of recognition in the teal blue eyes, but the shortest boy tried his best to keep it off his face.

“What’s trans? Is that like riding the train a lot?” The green haired girl asked with enthusiasm.

“No, it means he was born a girl,” Neil explained the matter of factly.

“But David’s a boy,” Nikki said with a frown as she got stuck.

“That’s the fucking point, Nikki, he’s a boy but he was born a ducking girl so he had to fix that.” Max quipped at his best friend.

“Ohhh sort of like when Neil became a girl to join the flower scouts,” Nikki shouted before running off to join the rest of the campers to tell them all.

“What?” All three remaining people asked turning to Neil in confusion.

_______________________________________________

Later that evening after David and Jasper got the rundown of the time the trio had tried to escape the camp, they settled in for a bonfire. The two male councilors settled onto a log beside one another, David pulled out his guitar and the two sang a couple songs together.

“Are you two married or some shit?” Max asked coming up from behind them causing Jasper to jump, he had been warned how stealthy Max could be but he hadn’t really expected it to be as bad as t was.

David had learned not to react. “Well yeah Max we’re not married but we’ve been together since high school.” He said honestly.

“When did you stop being a girl?” Max asked bluntly, it caused David to laugh. “I’ve never been a girl, but I didn’t really realize it till the summer after I first met Jasper here at camp Campbell.”

“We were the same age as you, Max,” Jasper added cheerfully.

“Then why the fuck did you call him by the wrong name?” Max asked clearly sensing bullshit.

David and Jasper shared a glance and then looked back to the boy. “We thought…”

Max felt his cheeks flush deeply. “What the fuck are you two homos looking at?” He asked looking away shoving his hands in his pockets and walking away without an answer. 

David wanted to correct Max that, that hadn’t been a very nice thing to say but at the child walked away David was actually happy that Max counted him as homosexual since not everyone did.

“Well, that went… better than expected?” The redhead said a little stunned.

____________________________________________

The following weeks were filled with random, misinformed questions that they boys understood were questioning and well intended. They answered them with patience and care, giving the kid the best answers they could to most of it.

They still weren’t entirely sure where Max stood until haircut day came. The kids were at camp long enough that once a month they offered haircuts. On the day Max came in as he always did climbing into the chair, his curly hair falling into his face a little, he looked at the wall with almost dead eyes.

“Max do you even want a haircut?” The redhead asked.

This was where it started, Max glanced up at the redhead in surprise. “I don’t have to?”

David shook his head. “No Max of course not, if you don’t want to you don’t have to.” He jogged over to a drawer in the bathroom and pulled out a hair tie. “Here you can take this if you want.”

“Thanks…” Max took the elastic and looked in the mirror considering his hair was the first signs of care that David had ever seen. “Can you… show me how?” He asked holding up the elastic.

“Of course Max!” He said coming over gently pulling Max’s curls back into his hands and wrapping the elastic around it. A small curl fell down beside Max’s face and both pairs of eyes looked at it when David reached to fix it Max smacked his hand away.

“Leave it.” The kid said before slipping off the chair. “Thanks… David…” He said looking at the ground before leaving again.


	2. Acceptance Is a Journey You Can't Be Pushed Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max tries to deal with the growing problems.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wrote this on break at work, tired will post in the other fic when I wake up in a couple hours.

“You didn’t get a haircut max?” Nikki asked at dinner in the mess hall, there wasn’t any judgment In her voice as she spoke.

“Fuck haircuts,” Max said clearly trying to work it into his edgy uncaring personality.

“It doesn’t look bad,” Neil commented, of course, he noticed the curl, but Neil was smarter than to comment on it or to judge. “Did David try to make you get a haircut?”

“Of course but after we fought he made me take the stupid fucking hair tie so it didn’t get in my face. Whatever I don’t care.” He said it resting his face on his hand trying to cover the smile on his lips.

Nikki didn’t notice, she was too oblivious of those things but Neil had been aware of it pretty quickly.

 

That night when they made their way back to the tent Neil stopped inside the door after closing it looking over to Max. “Max?” He asked.

“What the fuck do you want Neil? I want to go to sleep asshole.” Max was already starting to strip and Neil quickly turned his back.

“You’ve been talking to David a lot lately since…” he flushed.

“Since what?” Max asked sounding annoyed. “What the fuck are you trying to say, Neil?”

“Would you be more comfortable bunking with Nikki?” The taller blonde blurted out.

“What why?” Max’s voice had a rising panic in it now.

Neil shuffled over to his bed awkwardly as he thought about changing and wasn’t sure if he should.

“What the fuck is wrong with you you’ve never had a problem with changing in front of me before? And if I fucking bunked with Nikki she’d keep me up all night.” He grumbled dropping down onto his cot.

Neil glanced sideways at max and changed in a hurry not wanting to say anything else assuming the other just wasn’t ready to talk about it.

 

The following days were quiet but Neil started finding creative ways to avoid changing in front of Max, making max feel more and more uncomfortable. After about a week of this Max went to David. 

He sat in the edge of He councilors bed looking down swinging his feet. “Could you cut my hair?” Max asked with a sigh.

“Awe max, but you look so cute,” David said softly. “Are you sure that’s what you want?”

Max flushed deeply letting his foot slam back against the frame. “Neil is acting all weird and it’s really fucking annoying and the only thing that’s different is that I didn’t cut my hair.”

David’s face softened a little. “Sweetie Neil is a really smart kid and he knows you well when I was your age, Jasper knew before I did what I wanted.” He explained softly. 

Max glared at David then. “I don’t want anything it’s just fucking hair it doesn’t mean anything! So just fucking cut it off so I don’t have to fucking deal with this anymore.” He shouted at David.

“Max-“ He was cut off when max started to sob. “Max!” The redhead moved forward kneeling in front of the other. “Oh max what’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I just be normal? Why can’t I just be happy how I am? I just want to fucking be me…” he covered his face feeling vulnerable.

“Max, it’s okay. Its all okay… sometimes different can be better.” He said softly. “Sometimes the body we’re born into isn’t always right…” David was struggling to find the words, he was a youth counselor this was his job and usually, he was really good at it, but now he was struggling to find the words because it was Max.

Max looked up at him incredulously. “You don’t fucking get it, do you? I can’t just say this shit to anyone! My father would fucking kill me and my mother wouldn’t lift a finger. They don’t care about me, but they would care about how I looked to the rest of the Indian immigrant community! And that’s not something that fucking happens.” 

David reached up and gently brushed away one of the other’s tears gently. “Max, sometimes in life we have to do things that make us happy for the safety of our own self.”

“And sometimes we have to pretend those things don’t fucking exist to avoid being fucking beaten to death David!” Max shouted hopping down off the bed and shuffling out the door.

David watched stunned by the kid’s words, his heart dropping through his stomach with fear for the child. David knew that Max’s life was probably hard enough as it was and now to have to deal with the realization…. His heart ached for the boy.

____________________

That night as they lay in bed cuddling David finally spoke up, he told Jasper about what happened and what Max had said to him.

“Awe Davey, I wish I had been there too… maybe we could have calmed him down together.” Jasper said pressing his face against the other's chest closing his eyes.

David stroked the others curls gently closing his eyes. “Maybe we could… start working on getting our foster license… just incase anything happens after Camp?” He was so nervous about asking this for fear that Jasper would get upset at the idea of the volatile teen in their home.

“Mmmm,” Jasper mumbled his voice heavy with sleep. “Honestly I’d take Max even if something didn’t happen.” 

The redhead felt his heart flutter in his chest. “You would?”

“That kid deserves a lot better than the shit end of the stick they’re being given.” Jasper shrugged.

“Do you think it’s a safe time to stop calling Max him?” David wondered softly.

Jasper shrugged. “Maybe wait till the kid actually says they want to use a different pronoun but in private I’d be more comfortable not just flat out calling Max him.”

David loved how supportive Jasper was of this stuff, how attentive he was to things like pronouns and feelings. It just solidified his feelings more. “Thank you Jas, I love you.”

“I love you too.” He grumbled. “If I had to bet the kid is going to come out to you soon.” Jasper settled in pulling the blanket up more around them. “Now lets sleep so we can be awake to handle whatever situation comes up tomorrow.”


	3. Accepting "They"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max starts to navigate away from masculine pronouns.

“Neil you’re being really shitty lately.” Max murmured that night, their back was turned to the boy in the other side of the room. 

There was movement from that corner as Neil rolled over to look across the room towards max. “You’re being weird lately.” He shot back at the other.

Max shifted around to look over at the other the hurt clear in their eyes. “I’m not fucking weird, you’re being a fucking asshole right now.”

Neil was surprised by the other’s reaction, he wasn’t actually expecting the other to be hurt by it since Max was always so closed off and unaffected by everything. “It’s true though! Your hair is at your shoulders now, and whenever it’s guys versus girls you hesitate to join us.”

Max brushed their hair back from their face subconsciously tucking a curl behind their ear. “What did you say to the flower scouts that time?”

“That they were being ignorant fucking cunts?” Neil said it confused at first and then the realization slowly dawned on him and he pushed himself into a sitting position. “Oh… max… I… I didn’t think about it.”

“No, you fucking didn’t.” They said swallowing tightly running a hand through their hair. 

Neil shifted forward. “I’ve been thinking about how it makes me feel and not about how hard it must be for you…” 

“You’ve been an asshole for days. I don’t give a shit about you changing in front of me! It’s never been a fucking problem before so why does it have to be a fucking thing?” Max shouted angrily.

Neil looked down. “I really fucked up didn’t I?” He asked with a small sigh.

“You’re fucking telling me, asshole?” They went to turn over again but stopped when they heard the other inhale and could feel him want to ask a question. “What?” 

“So are… are you like David?” He couldn’t figure out how else to ask it.

“Do I have to know right now? I’m still trying to figure it out myself Neil. Why does it matter? Why do I have to fucking be one thing or the other?” Max pushed themselves up to look over at Neil. 

“For the record… your hair looks nice.” He said flushing deeply at that.

Max smirked a little bit at that. “Do you secretly have a thing for curly haired Indian girls?”

“Fuck dude don’t make it weird!” Neil laughed awkwardly the blush moving all the way up into the tips of his ears. He panicked a little though when he said it. “Can I still call you dude?” He asked.

“Yeah, fuck yeah, I don’t care what you call me! Just quit being a fucking asshole.” Max replied honestly sighing softly.

 

Neil’s expression softened a little bit. “Alright… I’m sorry Max, genuinely.” He slowly settled back onto the cot. “You’re still Max, nothings changed, you’re just… more yourself.”

Those words hit the little queer child on the other side of the room pretty hard, bringing tears to their eyes. “Thanks, Neil.” 

________________

Getting Neil to accept how Max felt was pretty easy, it was explaining it to Nikki that was much harder. She understood Max was growing out their hair, that they were feeling a little more comfortable with themselves, but Nikki was struggling with understanding how that had to do with Max’s identity.

“Nikki we’ve gone through this shit already, you understand that David was born in a girl body but is a boy.” The trio was hauled up in Neil and Max’s tent, they’d kidnapped Nikki away from David’s activities for the day with Jasper’s permission.

“Yeah!” Nikki agreed cheerfully before her face went sour. “I just don’t understand how that relates to Max and his hair though.”

“Their hair.” Neil corrected her quickly and noticed Max’s cheeks flush, his own heart rising a little.

“Thanks…” Max mumbled softly.

Nikki looked between them. “But Max is only one person.”

“But Max isn’t sure that Max is a He,” Neil repeated again.

“So Max is a she?” Nikki asked bringing panic to Max.

“No Max is a they until Max can figure out which way they are most comfortable. Which might always just be a they.” Max really appreciated the boy’s defense of their choice. The way Neil was talking was helping them feel more comfortable even just thinking about themselves as something other than he.

“So Max…. isn’t a boy?” Nikki asked to clear up.

“Right,” Neil replied.

“But isn’t sure if…. They? Are a girl?” Nikki was finally starting to get it.

Neil let out an exasperated sigh. “FUCKING FINALLY. Yes, Nikki, this is what I’ve been fucking saying this entire time!”

“So does Max want to bunk with me instead?” Nikki asked obviously hopeful.

Max immediately shouted back. “FUCK NO!” They moved and sat down gently on their own cot looking at Nikki like a demon who’d been kicked. “You know I love you Nikki, but sometimes you can be a little much and I need fucking sleep.”

“Fine.” Nikki crossed her arms over her chest with a frown. “Can I go now? I kinda want to go see what they’re all doing with David.” 

“Yeah whatever,” Max mumbled watching her run off leaving them and Neil sitting there a little awkwardly. “Thanks… for everything you said.” 

Neil looked over flushing and smiling. “It’s okay… I’m happy to do so…. I want to make up for the shit I caused you.”

“I really appreciate that,” Max admitted, they curled a lock of hair around their finger biting their bottom lip looking down, Max was more open about their emotions this year, growing in maturity. 

“Do you want to go for a walk and see what cool shit we can find?” Neil asked them softly, a pink heat filling his cheeks.

“Y-yeah, be fucking better than whatever the fuck David has planned.” Max slowly got to their feet pulling their hair into a bun on top of their head. “Common maybe we can catch QT doing some weird ass shit before dinner.” Max hesitated by the tent flap and grabbed Neil’s hand, their cheeks flushed a little as they led the other out towards the walking paths.


	4. Accepting "She"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max finally comes out to David and Jasper

David was relieved when he saw Max enter the mess hall that night, Jasper had informed him that Max, Neil, and Nikki had taken the day to work out friendship problems surrounding Max’s changing feelings. While David appreciated that, it was a little nerve-wracking when the green haired camper came back to the group by herself and neither Max nor Neil were seen for hours. 

When they arrived David was surprised to see how close to Neil Max was standing, that the small queer kid was clearly favoring the taller blonde. Nurf had turned to say something about it, but if looks could kill the expression Max was giving Nurf would have slaughtered the bully on sight. 

He watched patiently as the kids went and got food together before settling at their usual table, Max appearing a little more cheery even while brushing off Nikki who was grilling them about where they had been. 

“FUCK OFF NIK!” Max shouted, though there was a smile on their face as they did so. “We just went for a fucking walk to see what freaky shit we could catch QM up to.” Max rolled their eyes before slinging potato mush across the table to hit Nikki. David watched in awe at the small laugh and glitter in the mischievous teal eyes. 

That night after dinner he wasn’t surprised to hear the nervous little knock on the door, he waited enough time to make it seem like he hadn’t been waiting for Max to knock before opening it. 

“Hey… can I… Can we talk?” This time Jasper was stretched out on the bed reading so Max took up one of the chairs. 

“Of course, always, that’s what we're here for Kiddo.” David glanced at Jasper who took this as the signal to put his book away for now. “What’s on your mind sweetie?”

The word didn’t make Max flinch anymore and David wondered if it had been related to the complicated questions that had been bouncing around Max’s head. “I think…” Max looked nervously between David and Jasper before finally blurting it out. “I think you’re right, I think I’m like you.” 

David clasped his hands steepled over his face trying to hide his delight that Max had come to them to talk about it. “You do?”

Max fidgeted with the bottom of the blue hoodie not sure what to say. “I think… I think I really like…” The poor child couldn’t bring the words out.

“Neil?” David prompted pulling an angry flare out of the queer child.

“And so what if I do like him?” They shot an angry glance up temper flaring.

“You’re allowed to have a crush on your best friend Max,” Jasper assured the other winking up at David.

“It’s not like I fucking want to do anything weird or gross like you adults and your….” A small hand was waved towards the bed. “whatever weird ass shit you do. Just like… I like being around him and shit and he’s the only one who actually cares about what I’m going through.” These words made David so glad that Max and Neil had made up. “But like how I feel about Neil has nothing to do with this…” the queer child waved at their hair and their body. “I can still like him and still feel like… you right?” They directed this question towards David then.

“Yes, Max! Of course, you can like whoever you want and still feel like the body parts you have don’t match how you feel.” David said with a little nod. “I like boys too remember? But I’m still a boy.”

Max nodded at this. “And I don’t have to stop being Max right?”

“Names don’t really have gender and regardless the name Max goes either way anyways.” Jasper piped up catching Max by surprise.

“My parents would never accept it… but maybe… just for this summer…” David bit his lip looking down as the girl struggled to find the words.

“you could be you?” David offered.

“I could be me.” Max nodded a little bit. “And maybe… by being me… I could be a girl… but I don’t want a different tent I couldn’t share a tent with anyone else….” Max said quickly. “we worked out the changing thing and it’s fine we hung up a sheet or whatever to change behind…”

“Yeah alright, Max,” David said with a little nod. “That’s fine.” He gave the little girl a warm smile crouching down beside her and reaching out gently stroking her cheek where the tears had started to fall. “You can be whoever you want here, always. Next year too.” He reassured the little girl.

Max sniffled trying to make the tears stop. “It’s not like I only just thought about it…. I never could get how I felt before. But then I met this other kid back home who was that way and his parents were helping him be himself and that was sort of when it started to click for me. I thought I couldn’t tell anyone and so I put all these stupid walls up but you and your stupid fucking cheery self, knocked them all fucking down….. stop fucking doing that or I’m not going to have any fucking left to protect me in the real world.” 

David reached out and wrapped the little girl into a close hug. “It’s okay Max…. I will do whatever you need.”

________

Summer came and went that year pretty quickly. Max let her hair grow down before the last day when she had to cut it all off again, much to Neil’s growing disdain. Max’s feelings for Neil grew slowly over that summer and were returned before they got on the bus to return to the pickup point David even saw the little girl kiss the boy on the cheek before jumping on the bus. They had exchanged numbers and emails, Max had all the contact info for David and Jasper too so that if anything ever happened she could contact them. David wished that Max’s parents could learn to accept her in time. They went back to their regular lives for the rest of the year, exchanging emails and occasional phone conversations. Max’s 12th birthday came and went, David, wanted to send her a gift but was told he couldn’t by Max because of how rough her home life was. 

By the time Spring rolled around David was ecstatic about getting back to camp, even with Campbell in jail they still had more than enough funds to keep the camp running for a few more years. Jasper even surprisingly agreed to come back this year with David, which he appreciated. When he received the camper list he was happy to see the trio were all registered once again, he couldn’t wait for camp and the kids.


	5. Back to Camp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max's feelings for the last year

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posting this early :)
> 
> You have itsalieimnotaghost to thank, hopefully this makes it better :)

For years camp had been hell for Max, his own little personal hell where his parents sent him to avoid dealing with him over the summer. During the other months of the year, he was in school and after-school programs until bed essentially, so he was never home and they never had to deal with him. He hated how cheery the camp counselor was, how annoying the stupid owner was, how disgusting the quarter mater was. It was just hell.

However this year was different, camp was like a breath of fresh air for her, because she could be herself here. This year she could start off the summer with a shag of hair that hadn’t been cut in weeks that she could almost fit into the hair tie her annoyingly cheery councilor had given her last year. She had worn it like armor all year long, just under the sleeve of her blue hoodie around her wrist always. After her birthday it was joined by a beaded bracelet she’d received from her best friend and crush.

She was excited to get to actually see and spend time with Neil, he was a dork with curly hair and glasses. She had been fast friends with he and Nikki when they first arrived at camp, but there were things about Neil that had been annoying at first. Simple things like the way he said certain words, and acted like he knew everything, how annoyingly obsessed with science he was. But slowly over time, they grated against her nerves less, even became things she found endearing. She found herself missing him ramble on about stupid shit. Missing how smart he really was, especially because she hated microbiology more than anything in the world and nearly failed the science class that year because of it. But most of all she missed his hunger for knowledge, watching him struggle away trying to figure out how something worked to have a greater understanding of the universe. She couldn’t wait to see him again. 

Though of course, she knew their friendship would never become anything, one day they would stop going to camp, they would fall out of touch, they would never actually become anything. Her crush on him would never go past the camp Campbell campground, and even if it did the likelihood of long distance relationships especially ones started in their youth would survive was so low that it wasn’t even something to hope for. Because hope was stupid and could not ignore the statistical facts both of them knew. So the crush was just that, as a crush, that would never go past a tiny tent they shared at a shitty camp in the middle of the woods. 

Even if it somehow did, her parents would never even accept her to be a girl let alone accept her with a boy.

She would never be a she really, and she would never get to be anything with Neil either.

But somehow she felt herself wishing that Camp could just never end and continue long enough for her to enjoy being who she was, that she never had to go back to the house where she felt alienated and unwanted. 

She even found herself missing David, the stupid overly enthusiastic camp counselor, and his stupid boyfriend Jasper. With Jasper around David was a little more bearable, and both were the only adults in her life who encouraged her to be herself. They supported her in a way that no one in her life ever had and probably ever would again. They were what she pretended real parents were supposed to be like, when she pictured her future in those fleeting moments she allowed herself to dream she imagined graduating high school and coming off the stage to the two of them cheering her on. She imagined them driving her to university for the first time, dropping her off and helping her set up her dorms. Sometimes she even imagined getting to walk down the aisle with a suspiciously similar curly haired man, in a dress with the two gay councilors sitting where the parents were supposed to go. But those were stupid childhood dreams that Max would never admit to anyone.

Over the fall she had gotten into more trouble than ever before in school and her parents hated her for it, she genuinely felt like this year might be the year they actually just abandoned her at camp. It’s not like their life would change at all if she were gone. 

She thought about Nikki, shifting her thoughts away from the shitty ones as she rode in the taxi for the long drive to camp, staring out at the familiar trees as they passed. The green haired girl had struggled so much with the idea of transgender over the summer the year before, but in her emails seemed to be getting it more now. Nikki was a bit of a slow learner sometimes. Max’s heart had raced when she read Nikki say she wanted to braid the other's hair, and paint her nails and do the “other stupid girly shit no one ever wants to do with me because I’m not girly enough all the other times” as she had put it. 

Somehow Max was really looking forward to this summer, it might actually be a decent one.

Once she was dropped off with her duffle bag at the camp she watched as the Taxi went, it always dropped her off at the campground instead of the drop-off point since her parents were way too eager to get rid of her. Realizing she was too early and no one else had arrived yet she headed off to look for her councilors, she wanted to see their stupid ass happy faces before they went to go to the drop off point to get the other kids.


	6. Just Clothing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone at camp gets in on support Max, even David's mom

Part of the forms that had to be filled out for camp was clothing size, for camp t-shirts or emergencies, this David and Jasper took advantage of the second they heard Max was coming back to camp this year. Every time they went by a store and they saw something cute they ended up buying too. Really the idea snowballed, it had started with the intention of just getting a couple things but by the time they got to camp they had more than enough for her for the summer.

“What the fuck is this?” Max’s voice came from the front door as she dropped her duffle. “Is this… for me?” She was confused.

“Awe max you ruined the surprise!” David and Jasper had been sorting it out of one of the bags they’d brought and David was now a little distraught to have had it ruined.

Max rolled her eyes as he came over. “It’s still a fucking surprise David. I’m still really surprised. Why the fuck would you, What is all this?”

David laughed a little. “It started out as just a couple things, but then we just ended up picking things up here or there… and my mom got stuff…”

“Your mom?” Max made a face at that and then looked down. “So it’s…?”

“It’s for you! They’re for you! For you to wear while you’re at camp this summer!” David exclaimed.

“Look if you’re gonna get stuck at this shitty camp every summer you might as well have fun doing it,” Jasper said with a grin, max and Jasper had long since bonded over their disdain for the terrible camp.

Max nervously picked up a yellow tank top inspecting it before looking up at them. “Is this really Okay? I’m just some fucking kid who is not your problem.”

Jasper was smiling now wrapping his arms around David’s shoulders from behind both of them looking down at her made her think of those stupid dreams she hated. 

She looked at the jeans on the bed, they were more of a feminine shape and ripped and she couldn’t help but feel a draw to them. “Go ahead.” David’s voice was soft and understanding reaching out and touching her shoulder.

She jumped in surprise looking up at him with a frown. “Could you two stop fucking hanging over me for like five minutes so I can just think?” 

Max barely got the words out before the door came crashing open and Gwen was dragging her luggage in. “Hold the fuck up!” She shouted. “Wait for me!”

She was throwing her bags on her bed now rummaging through them, books, DVDs and clothes falling all over the place before she hauled out a cloth shopping bag. “Okay now get in the bathroom!” She shouted at max.

“What the fuck is happening?” The 12-year-old shouted as she was suddenly being hauled towards the bathroom by the taller woman.

Gwen grinned brightly. “Just trust me, they may have bought you clothes but they don’t really know what they’re doing.” She said pushing Max in and closing the door behind them.

“This is pretty fucking weird Gwen!” She said that, but part of her wanted to know what Gwen had.

Gwen had a few smaller but more important things, she had female underwear and trainer bras. This made Max blush furiously. “I don’t have anything to go into those!”

“No one does your age, Max! They’re for fun, they make you feel like a girl, every little girl wears them for fun, not because she needs them.” Gwen explained, which actually brought a lot of comfort to her. Max didn’t want to admit just how good such a stupid little thing made her feel accepted. 

“Thanks or whatever…. Now turn away so I can put them on…” She shoved Gwen into the shower and closed the curtain too embarrassed to change in front of the adult, mainly because she couldn’t fight the growing smile on her lips and she didn’t need Gwen to see it.

She changed and pulled on the ripped jeans and the yellow tank top looking at herself in the mirror thoughtfully, she was a little disappointed at how short her hair was. “Don’t worry about it kid, there’s plenty of girls your age with short hair, I can work with this,” Gwen said ruffling the curls with a grin, practically reading Max’s mind.

She flushed again looking up at the camp counselor in awe changing into skepticism. “Why are you helping me?”

Gwen rolled her eyes at the question. “Because we all want you to be happy Max, the world is full of pretty shitty things and sometimes it just feels good to make a cute little girl feel good about herself.” She gently pinched Max’s cheek, the little girl quickly swatting the hand away and rubbing the now sore spot. “Plus when was the last time you saw Neil?” Gwen gave a playful smirk.

“None of your fucking business.” Her hand subconsciously went to her wrist where the bracelet was.

“I remember my first crush when I was your age….” Gwen continued talking but Max had lost interest letting the words fade out of her attention. She watched as Gwen pulled out a blue sweater, it was almost the exact colour of Max’s usual hoodie, but instead, it had a cowl neck to it and was made of a lighter more sporty material, one that wouldn’t be quite as hot. 

“Is that for me?” Max blurted out in the middle of Gwen’s rambling, there was an expression that Gwen couldn’t recognize on the tween’s face and she realized it was the expression of longing, she was seeing Max genuinely interested in something.

Gwen smirked and held it out to the other. “Cute isn’t it?” she asked teasingly. “Yeah it’s for you kid, go ahead put it on!” 

As Max put it on Gwen was pulling out little metal sticks that Max vaguely recognized as bobby pins, though she wasn’t sure what they were exactly for. She studied a couple other items the female counselor pulled out of her bag but she couldn’t figure out what they were.

“Sit down on the toilet and close your eyes.” She instructed and Max did so a little awkwardly, she had, had a bit of a growth spurt recently and felt a little awkward with her limb, closing her eyes.

“You better not fucking do something weird to me.” She hissed through her teeth, she didn’t want to admit it but she really was nervous about seeing Neil, especially now that she was actually dressed differently. She felt different, it was a wonder how good it could feel just to be wearing different closer. 

Blindly she picked at one of the holes on her knee as she felt the other work at her hair, she also felt a weird pinch at her ear. She felt occasional poking and prodding on her head too, just what were bobby pins anyway?

“Okay okay don’t open your eyes but stand up, yeah like that, oh be careful of your arm okay wait there.” Gwen guided her up so she was standing in front of the mirror. When she looked in the mirror finally her heart raced. Gwen had braided either side of her hair back leaving the top fluffy and free but braided from in front of all the way back behind her ear. She looked like a girl, she was a girl, she was looking at herself in the mirror and she didn’t hate the person staring back. There was a metal cuff over the top of her ear that amused her a little to look at. She pulled her hands out of her pockets and without hesitation she hugged the Latina tightly. Gwen was so surprised but was grinning ear to ear, bending down a little to hug her.

“Your welcome Max.” She said answering the unsaid thank you. “Do you want eyeliner?” she twirled the stick in her hand with a little grin.

______

When they came out of the bathroom neither boy was expecting what they saw, David’s hands flew up covering his mouth tears welling in his eyes. “AW MAX!” He exclaimed with excitement.

“SHIT YOU LOOK AMAZING!” Jasper shouted from the other end of the room with a laugh.

Max frowned a little shaking her head. “Would you two calm the fuck down, it's just clothing…” She said this but she was already making her way over to give David and then Jasper each a silent hug, an unspoken thank you. Each man hugged her back both more warm and loving than Max ever thought an adult could be.

“Okay, let's go get the other campers,” Gwen said with a brilliant grin.


	7. Reunited

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The campers make their way back to camp

She had tried to go to the back of the bus to sit by herself, but David and Jasper had made her come join them up front. She sat a row behind them with her feet up on the back of the seat pushing into David’s back who seemed only mildly bothered by it. The counselors’ laughed and talked on the drive up sometimes roping Max into the conversation, and she had to admit that the place that had once felt like hell was becoming home. Sitting there amongst the three adults, she felt like she belonged like she was someone that could belong, that she was normal. No, that wasn’t right, she was different but she felt like maybe different could be better. 

When they stopped at the drop off point Max looked out the window, fidgeting nervously. “Will they even recognize me?” Max wondered out loud. “Will they know who I am?”

David turned around in his seat reaching out and brushing one stray curl from her face. “You’re still our Max,” David said softly his face reassuring.

“You’re still a little piece of shit.” Gwen offered the girl a teasing grin.

“Sullen, Jaded and cynical just like all the other cool teenagers,” Jasper added, these little things were so comforting to Max, not that she would ever fucking tell them.

She rolled her eyes and stood up. “Okay let's go get the fucking campers.” She made a shooing motion towards the doting adults. 

When they made it outside she found herself thankful for the lighter sweater, the sun beating down on them was nearly unbearable. She moved over to the picnic table stepping up onto the seat and planting her ass on the table looking out from the shade with a disdain for the world that could only be cultivated by a teenager. 

She shifted a little trying not to look hopeful when she heard the sound of an engine, looking up she saw a car that was not Neil’s father’s shitty little Toyota Camry. She looked away pretending to be disinterested, but she wondered what this person would think. It was Space Kid, she noticed out of the corner of her eye, he was still wearing the stupid fucking fishbowl but this year instead of cardboard he had a NASA kids bomber jacket so at least that wasn’t nearly as bad. She glanced over long enough to see him look Max over, but he showed no sign of recognition which only hardened her heart a little bit. Who the fuck cared what Space kid thought anyway? She reminded herself.

‘He’s the only one who fucking matters, either these losers will like you or they won't who fucking cares about them, you don’t interact with them anyways.’ She reminded herself this too.

It was some time before the giant ford pick up came rolling down the shit road that was barely wide enough for it, She looked up and could see Candy behind the steering wheel and Carl looking mildly terrified in the passenger seat. Her heart lept and she felt the heat in her cheeks but she refused to let herself show her excitement. She hadn’t moved from her seat, and everyone had been too afraid to approach her, mostly because they couldn’t figure out what exactly was going on. 

When it came to a stop she turned her head just far away from it that she could only watch out of the corner of her eye, she didn’t want to seem too interested but she had to see Neil’s reaction. 

The green haired girl was out first, like a wild dog who had been caged to long, she bounced in a circle scanning for Max but she didn’t see the boy she was looking for. That wasn’t to say she didn’t notice Max, she turned immediately to Neil. “Who do you think that girl is? She seems so mysterious!” Nikki exclaimed more then loud enough for Max to hear and she had to stifle a laugh at that. 

Neil was focused on getting his bags out and making sure everything was there, he was obsessing trying to cope with the nerves he felt about seeing Max for the first time this summer. Would it still be like last summer? Would she still like him? Would she still be Max? There were a thousand question rolling around his head and he had no idea that she was thinking much the same anxious self deprecating way. “Huh Nikki? What Girl-“ Neil stopped mid-sentence having seen her now. “Oh…” His face flared up and he adjusted his glasses but didn’t stop staring. He took a gasp of air when he realized he’d been holding in. “Nikki you idiot….” He groaned, Nikki hadn’t gotten taller but Neil had by at least half a foot.

“What? Who is that Neil?” She asked when she realized he knew.

“Fuck Nikki it’s Max!” He exclaimed though his words were so filled with revelation he was still scared.

That was all that needed to be said, all the campers that stood around turned to look at the girl at the table with a sudden realization. 

“Jesus Christ does everyone have to fucking look at me now?” She asked as she pulled herself up off the picnic table, stepping down off of it slowly. As she moved towards them the crowd parted for her and she made her way over to Neil who had already dropped his bags and was moving towards her. His feet carrying him before he even knew what he was doing, what he was going to say. She looked up at him from under her long dark eyelashes and Neil had to wonder if her eyes had always been so bright. “Hey.” She said giving him a little half smile.

“H-hey.” He stumbled over his words, his heart way past elevated and he wondered if he should be concerned, could someone die from this much anxiety? Was it possible for your heart to overload just from looking at someone?

“You guys are kinda late,” Max said casually, both scrambling for anything to talk about.

“Yeah well, the Camry broke down so we all had to come in Candy’s truck and Dad was kind of freaking out.” Neil tried to shrug it off but it came across a little stiff.

“I uh… thanks for the birthday present.” Max offered holding up her wrist to show she still had it on.

Neil felt the heat grow in his cheeks as he realized she still had it. “I-I’m glad you like it.” He admitted. “I had a hard time picking it out… it reminded me of your eyes!” He blurted the last part out and regretted it the second it left his lips.

Finally, this broke her sullen expression and she let out a little laugh gently punching his arm. “You’re such a fucking nerd, you know that?” She teased, instead of retracting her hand it unballed from a fist and rested against his arm. 

He looked down at her taking a deep breath but the more he looked at her, he felt like he was in over his head. “I missed you.” He finally managed to say.

“Yeah, I missed you too.” The girl's response let all the tension out of Neil’s shoulders and suddenly he was much more relaxed.

Nikki ruined the moment though. “I missed you too Max!” She exclaimed. “I like your clothes and your hair and this whole thing is so cool!” She was bouncing on the balls of her feet, the two turning to look at the youngest member of the trio.

Max actually snorted when she laughed this time and Neil noticed the way her nose crinkled when she did so. “Yeah Nik, I missed you too. And thanks.” She glanced over at the counselors who were just finishing up the last of the paperwork. “Let's go get on the bus.” She said with a little grin sliding her hand into Neil’s and leading them towards the bus.

He followed her like a lost puppy, so stunned by the smile on her lips and the way she so easily took his hand, she didn’t even care that his palms were sweaty. He wished he had half the courage she did, but at least maybe that meant she had enough courage for both of them.


	8. The Bus Ride Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max is face with insecurities about the other campers
> 
> aka just more cute young teen crush fluffy wholesome goodness
> 
> Unless I write this fic until they're older youll just get a lot of cute fluffy moments between them

The bus ride back was less comfortable than the one down, she could feel their eyes every time they looked at her, they didn’t know this Max. They didn’t know the Max that was sat in the back corner silently holding hands with her nerdy best friend. They didn’t know the Max that wore training bras and put her hair up and let counselors put make up on her. They didn’t know the Max that was so much more comfortable in her own skin but yet weirdly alien at the exact same time.

Neil could see the discomfort in her and he leaned in giving her hand a squeeze with his paler one. “You look really cool you know?” Neil told her softly turning her hand over in his and rubbing small circles into the back of her hand, he’d seen it on some show and when he watched her relax a little he figured it must actually work.

“You think so?” She asked turning her face to his, completely unconscious of how close they were. “You don’t think I look like a freak?”

Neil had spent so long staring at her teal eyes that it was only now that they were this close that he noticed she had the tiniest freckles peppering over her nose and cheeks. This small observation made his pulse pick up again, how had he never noticed that before? “They’re all just fucking jealous, they wish they could be half as cool as you.” Neil said trying to put all his bravado into the words.

She did that thing again when she snorted and laughed a little, Neil watched with wonder as her nose crinkled and he reveled in it. “Jesus when the fuck did you become so sure?” She teased him bumping her shoulder against his. When Neil finally managed to pry his eyes away from his best friend he noticed that Nikki had run off to talk to Ered and they were actually alone laughing together in the back corner.

Neil noticed David glancing back at them and he noticed how protective David appeared to be over Max, part of him wondered if David saw himself in Max when he was her age. When David realized that Neil had caught him watching them the redhead gave a little wave and Neil managed an awkward wave back at the counselor with his free hand. 

His eyes passed over Gwen and for a moment he realized Gwen must have done Max’s hair. Thinking about Max’s hair made him look back again, it really did look good like this, though he wasn’t sure that he could ever dislike the curls that came out of her head.

“Do you think we’ll end up like them?” Max asked, stirring Neil out of his own thoughts, following Max’s sightline he saw that she was making faces at the male counselor who she’d caught watching them.

Neil’s heart skipped a beat, for a moment thinking that maybe she meant Jasper and David who had met at camp Campbell and were now like married or some shit. But after letting the thought sit it dawned on him she meant working here. “Working some dead-end job in the summers taking care of kids for some stupid fucking rich asshole?” Neil shrugged, this one being much easier than his last. “If the camp is still around by then maybe.”

Max laughed, every time she did it he felt himself relax more and more, she never laughed this much, ever, it was so nice to see her happy. “I fucking meant like, still friends, after all, that time.” She corrected him. “You, me and Nikki.”

“Well since I’m pretty fucking sure Dad is about to propose to Candy while we're gone, I think I might be stuck with Nikki for the rest of my fucking life.” He let out an exasperated sigh like it was the worst fucking fate.

He watched her teal eyes drop to their hands. “And us?”

Neil felt his stomach turn in knots. “I’d like to imagine we end up like them too.” He whispered softly.

She twisted her face up and stuck her tongue out at him. “Gross.” She joked but didn’t pull her hand away, it felt safe then. 

“I mean we're just fucking kids, who the fuck knows what will happen, but I hope that no matter what we always stay in contact. Even after camp, even after high school…” He watched her curls bounce as she nodded along, it was enough of a comfort to both the children.

_______________

They set up their tent like every year, cots on either side of the room, coffee pot in one corner and in the other they hung up a sheet to change behind. This year Max wasn’t nearly as bothered by it, this year she felt a little more confident in their friendship, so the anger from the past had really just been insecurity.

Max’s things were brought over from where she’d left them in the counselor’s cabin when she first arrived. Max was thankful because her duffle had been unpacked and repacked with the new clothes. She was also thankful Neil hadn’t asked her about where the clothes came from. 

She stretched out on her own cot that night in pajama shorts and a tank top she found amongst the clothes the boys had gotten her, even this was more comfortable than wearing what she had been sent with. Things were quiet for a while, but they weren’t awkward which both tweens appreciated. Max had found a quilt in her bag that she had to wonder if it came from David’s mom, at first it had been kind of weird to her but she didn’t hate it entirely so she put it on her bed. She had never in her life owned something this nice before.

“For my birthday this year, Mom got me a Ds,” Neil said trying to start a conversation. “It’s actually kind of fun… would you want to play sometime?” 

She thought about it for a long time. “Maybe.” She felt weird about the idea, really just because she had never played before. “I’ve never really played video games.” She admitted out loud, it was something she would never have thought she’d tell anyone but she wanted to let him in.

“You could watch me for a bit.” He suggested softly holding the gaming console up.

She turned her head to look over at him. “I don’t know…” she hesitated not really wanting to move from her bed. 

“We could push the cots together and then you don’t even have to get out of bed.” Neil knew her so well, she just wanted to fucking lay there and not move, but watching him sounded fun. So that was how their two cots ended up side by side, Neil laying on his back, her on her side to watch him. For once she fell asleep first clutching Mr. honeynuts to her chest as she slipped from consciousness.


	9. Hormones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ah if only to be a 13 year old again, crushing on girls, the only worry in the world being if they liked you or not. Poor Neil doesnt know how to handle it.

When he heard her breath change into the familiar pattern of sleeping Max, Neil slowly closed the Ds and rolled onto his side to face her cot. He watched the rise and fall of her chest, he knew Max better than anyone here and somehow he took comfort in it. To the rest of them, she was so different and foreign, they were struggling to understand her, but none of them here knew her like he did. 

He knew Max, she was the same person she’d always been, except… she was more herself than ever before. He was still learning new things about her, like just how young she looked when she fell asleep. He’d never paid attention to that before. Or the freckles he’d missed being lost in those glittering teal eyes. He loved the way her eyes sparkled when she schemed, but he was learning his favourite expression was when she’d laugh and her nose would wrinkle up. His thoughts rolled sleepily over these things, little stupid details he knew too well about her.

His thoughts ground to an abrupt halt.

Oh fuck, this was a serious problem.

He was seriously in love with Max.

Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap.

He really did want to be like David and Jasper when they grew up. Holy fuck this was not okay. What if he fucked it up? There was no way she could possibly like him that much. A little crush sure that was believable but there was no way she loved him. It wasn’t possible.

Neil rolled over trying to forget it, closing his eyes, but even then all he close see was her perfect sleeping face shrouded in a mop of curls.

This was so bad, she was going to be so mad if she found out! Would she push him away? He thought about the way she had touched his arm today and how much he enjoyed sitting on the bus holding her hands. She had looked too happy today, even just staring out the window at nature, she looked at peace. 

His heart raced and he rolled over looking at her again, he didn’t want to pull away from her but he also didn’t want to make it fucking weird. They just talked, and sometimes they’d touch, she held his hand or they would stand closer but that was just normal things, right? Sure they liked one another but this wasn’t a real relationship or anything. His mind kept reminding him they were just kids, it was normal to feel this way towards your best friend when you were a kid, just a first crush, they wouldn’t last long and they wouldn’t ever actually be anything. That was everything Neil’s research had told him, or most of it anyways, there was, of course, the random case on the internet he found like David and Jasper who stuck together and grew together.

But camp would end for them both eventually and they would go separate ways for who knows how long, and then life would be different and one day he would look back on his feelings like every other old man on the internet, with stupid fondness.

But no one else in the universe was like Max, she was so unique and amazing and wonderful, he couldn’t dream of replacing her, not even for a second. Over the school year, his friends were all talking about girls, talking being the key word since Neil didn’t really fit in with any crowd and usually just ended up putting up with the nerds. They were all 13 and so all they ever thought or talked about were girls, but all Neil could think about was Max. To make himself seem cool to them he’d even told them she was his girlfriend, now laying there looking at her Neil prayed she never met a single one of them or found out about that lie. 

The logical side of Neil and his stupid 13-year-old hormones were at war.

Logically he kept reminding himself they were kids and this was just a stupid crush that was destined for failure.

But his hormones were screaming about how nice it would be to kiss her perfect soft looking lips. 

He hated this, he hated himself, he hated hormones and more importantly, he hated how much he wanted to reach out and just touch her, like hold her hand or twist one of those ringlets around his finger. 

Fucking hormones.

______________ 

She was the first to wake up and was surprised to find her hand was behind held by some unseen force. As her eyes flickered open she found that Neil’s hand was linked with her own. She flushed deeply looking over at him, she’d slept only half a foot or so from him, unlike Neil, she didn’t completely hate her hormones or how they made her feel. If anything they made her feel a little more normal, to feel attraction to him made her feel like a normal 12-year-old girl. 

She liked to think she was more in control of her emotions then he was though. This, however, was proven untrue when despite wanting coffee so badly she was ready to punch someone, she instead pretended to still be asleep just to get to hold his hand a little longer. More importantly, though she wanted to see his reaction when he woke up and realized they had slept holding hands.

She left her eyes barely open, just enough to see him, not enough for him to see she was watching him. It took a while, and while she thought it was going to a very boring thing to do, just watching him sleep, it actually became interesting. She took her time cataloging his face, things she hadn’t noticed before, the little marks from his glasses on his nose, the curls just in front of his ears, and the way his mouth hung slightly open as he slept. She couldn’t fight the smile, she hadn’t had enough coffee yet to have the will to keep it off her face. Was this what it felt to belong somewhere? Camp Campbell, doted on by Jasper and David, treated like a little sister by Gwen and cared for by an adorable nerd.

When she heard him start to stir she let the smile fall away, she watched as his eyes slowly opened, as it slowly dawned on him just what was happening. Almost immediately he tried to pull his hand away and Max held on a little tighter. “No don’t,” she whispered her voice sounded as tired as she felt.

“W-what?” He stuttered looking at her confused, his blush moving all the way up into the tips of his ears which caused a small giggle to bubble up from inside her chest. 

“I’m comfortable you nerd don’t move.” She said sliding her fingers between his knotting them with his. 

He glanced at the tent flap. “What time is it? Shouldn’t we be getting coffee and getting to breakfast?”

“Mmm maybe but I don’t want to move, David can fuck off I’m just gonna sleep all day.” She hugged Mr. Honeynuts closer to her chest and closed her eyes again, still not letting go of his hand. She could hear him breath in, struggling to decide what he had to do to get out of this situation. Finally she smirked and let go of his hand. “Fine go make me coffee if you want me to get out of bed.” She watched him go and she realized she could get used to not having to move in the morning to get coffee.

After he brewed a cup she finally rolled off her cot and onto her feet. “For the record, breakfast isn’t for another 40 minutes, I just wanted to see you panic,” Max said as she came up beside him picking up her Nope mug once he’d filled it and began to sip it as she looked through her clothes for the day. 

“How can you tell what time it is?” Neil asked a little confused, he knew Max didn’t have a cellphone, so how could she know?

Max looked over at him an all-knowing and mischevious twinkle in her eyes as she did so. “David and Jasper went for their morning run just before you woke up. I’m gonna go harass Gwen.” She set her empty mug back down and slipped out of the tent headed in direction of the counselor cabin.


	10. Someday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometime Max does need David, just don't mention it or acknowledge it

She didn’t even bother knocking, after a moment of groping around under the mat she pulled out the key to the cabin door and pushed it open.

“The fuck….. MAX?” Gwen was groggy and when she heard the key she was confused as to why the boys were back so early but she was more confused to see Max instead. 

“I’m using your fucking shower.” She mumbled making her way back into the bathroom without waiting for an answer. Gwen’s first instinct was to tell her no but then she quickly realized that Max probably wasn’t comfortable in either of the shared bathrooms, so she lay back down closing her eyes.

About 15 minutes later Max came out in the same ripped jeans and sweater as the day before with a pink tank top on underneath. “Can you do my hair again?” The way Max said it, it came off as more of a demand than a question.

“Jesus Max, who taught you manners?” Gwen huffed rolling up off the bed. “Comere kid.” She held out her hand and Max returned the bobby pins to her and Gwen set to work. With slow careful fingers, Gwen did a crown braid around the girls head, using bobby pins to hold end pieces, leaving curly whisps here and there in a way that looked natural.

When Max looked in the Mirror she made a face like perhaps she wasn’t as excited about this hairstyle but surprisingly said nothing at all. “Thanks.” She said poking at a stray strand.

She settled back into a seat when they were done and it was Gwen’s turn to make a face. “What are you doing? Go back to your tent dude, I gotta get ready for the day since you so rudely woke me up.” Gwen hissed.

“Can’t I just stick around here for a bit…?” Max glanced at the door and Gwen realized that she was waiting for the boys to get back from their jog.

“Yeah alright.” Her face softened a little as she gathered her things and headed for the shower. “The Tv remote is on the side table there.” 

Max flicked through the three channels they had in the cabin for twenty minutes till David and Jasper got back. When he came through the door the redhead stopped to look at the girl confused. “Max?” he slowly came over to the girl's chair to crouch down but she stopped him before he could.

“Ew gross your all nasty sweaty and smell like feet, go shower and then we’ll talk.” She said giving him a little shove with her foot covering her face with the cowl of her sweater.

David wanted to laugh but her tone made him worry so instead he frowned. “Okay, Max I’ll be right back.” The redhead quickly gathered his things and got a shower as fast as he could. 

By the time he came out he half expected Max to be gone, no longer interested in what she had wanted to talk about, but to his amazement, she was talking with Jasper who had sat down in front of her. They weren’t talking about anything, in particular, mostly Jasper was prodding her on what she liked to do in school and what interests she had, things, for the most part, she just brushed off or gave half answers to.

She looked up when David came out and she looked back down at Jasper. “Your turn to get a fucking shower stinky.” She poked him with her socked foot now, clearly not wanting to touch him.

“Where’s Gwen?” David asked curiously.

Max shrugged. “Something about Quartermaster and breakfast.” She said shaking her hand in a general direction.

“Is everything okay Max?” David asked settling onto the end of the bed closest to her.

She glanced up, waiting for Jasper to close the bathroom door before she was ready to talk. “How did you know you were a guy who likes guys? I mean like how do I know I'm not just gay and being a fucking idiot about this whole thing?”

David sighed a little at that and nodded. “It’s scary because it’s a struggle to come to know for certain, we fight ourselves on it sometimes even…. I guess it’s because you feel less like it’s a love thing and more like being yourself and doing what makes you happy. Why Max? Are you scared?”

“Fucking petrified…” She admitted in a little whisper. “What if I’m wrong? And Neil likes this me but doesn’t care about whoever I become?” 

David felt his heart sink. “Oh, sweetie…. I can’t speak for Neil, but no matter what happens you should never base your own happiness on someone else. You need to do and be what feels right for your own self and hope that it’s okay. But Neil is a smart kid and I think he knows what he’s getting into.” David assured the other gently reaching out and patting her shoulder. “And I’ve never met anyone in my life who felt the way we do and didn’t question it. I still have moments when I question it. Not because I think I’m not but because anxiety can be a hard beast… you need to trust you know who you are.”

Max looked down at herself with a deep sigh. “I am a girl… but outside of camp, I could never get to be….” she told him softly looking away from them both now. “Thank you for this time at camp…”

“Kiddo….” David wanted to wrap Max up in his arms and tell her it would all be okay but David knew enough of life not to lie. “It will happen someday.” This he was confident of.

“I would like that day…” She admitted. “if it ever came, but I’m not waiting for days that won't. I’m going to just enjoy as much of this hell hole as I can.” 

“Max…” David touched her shoulder again, he was fighting himself because all he wanted was to hug and comfort her. He was so surprised when she initiated it, getting up from the chair and hugging him. He crouched down enveloping her into his arms holding her tightly, trying to be a reassuring presence. “Max no matter what happens you will always have me to rely on okay? You will always be able to come to me…. I will always support you.” He said strongly.

“Too bad you aren’t my dad…” She whispered softly, it was so quiet he almost didn’t catch it.

He wanted to tell her that maybe someday her parents would come around, but he didn’t know. He never saw them for longer then a second before hauling Max away, they didn’t seem like the accepting type. “I wish I could be, it would be my honour to have you as my kid.” David whispered.

“Shut up, you're ruining this.” She mumbled clinging to him for a tight hug not ready to let go yet. “I’m going to go find fucking breakfast… thanks….” She pulled away slowly looking up at him for one long second. “Someday you’ll be a cool fucking dad, so long as you fucking calm down!”

David laughed a little and nodded. “I’ll see you there sweetheart.” He felt himself lean down and kiss the top of her head, but he didn’t realize what he’d done till she was blushing completely embarrassed by it as she left the cabin. He rationalized she hadn’t murdered him so perhaps things were getting better between them.


	11. Girlfriend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil gets a visitor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All I can preface this with is I'm sorry.....

She made her way from the counselor’s cabin, she had left her laundry in Gwen’s laundry hamper because it was just easier that way. She shoved her hands into her pockets and slowly shuffled towards her and Neil’s tent, kicking at the ground as she went not really paying attention to where she was going.

“Watch out cunt.” Tabii hissed at her, she was unsettling now with that eye patch.

Max scoffed. “Maybe you should fucking watch where you’re going.” She rolled her eyes at the pale girl and continued making her way back to her tent. Max became a little annoyed now though because the one-eyed bitch was following her. “What the fuck do you want?”

“Don’t I, Like, Know you or something?” She asked in that unbearably whiny tone of hers.

“Yes Tabii with two fucking I’s you’ve known me for three fucking years now and you’re still annoying as all hell.” Max hissed through her teeth as she unzipped the tent about ready to go inside when Neil met her at the entrance.

“Hey, I was just about to head to the mess and I thought I heard- Tabii? What the fuck are you doing here?” Neil looked at the girl accusatorily.

She looked between Max and Neil with a narrowed eye. “What the actual fuck is going on here? You don’t return my letters, you didn’t come see me last year and you haven’t talked to me since we kissed. Now I find out you’re sleeping with some other chick, are you peeing in her?”

Max looked horrified. “What the fuck does any of that even mean?” She asked looking at Neil quickly who looked like he was going to be sick.

“Tabii I told you to fuck off, you’re like some goddamn stalker. I only talked to you when you thought I was a girl, and that was a weird enough experience to want to put behind me, but now you keep harassing me? We never kissed! I passed out on stage and you fucking took over as Juliet! There was no kissing!” Neil reached out and took Max’s hand in panic when he could see she was starting to get upset. “And the last thing I don’t even want to address because its so weird and wrong and I don’t even know… where you learned that is beyond me but it’s so fucked. Max is my girlfriend so fuck off.”

Max’s cheeks flared up and she glanced at their hands and then up to Tabii in a sudden Panic. “Neil what are you…?”

Tabii seemed to realize now. “Ew is this the sweater-wearing gross ass boy who you’re always hanging around with? How could he be your girlfriend? He’s not even a fucking girl! It’s not like he’ll someday have boobs and you can’t pee in him.”

Neil looked overwhelmed he dragged his free hand over his face taking a deep breath. “What the fuck Tabii? That’s even more fucking ignorant and disgusting than anything you’ve ever said to me. Max can be whoever she wants to be and she is a girl, and my fucking girlfriend, so back the fuck off.” Neil took one step in front of Max now gently pushing the girl back. 

Max was stunned and about ready to be sick when nudged she moved back into the tent, she didn’t want to hear this anymore. Her heart was beating in her throat, she felt like she couldn’t expand her lungs enough to get oxygen in them, she stumbled to the bed and collapsed onto it gripping the edge of it until her fingers went numb.

She couldn’t hear most of what was happening outside anymore, it was drowned out in a buzz of thoughts. 

‘I will never have boobs.’ She thought with a dread that overwhelmed her so much that she could feel the water welling in her eyes.

‘I will never have the same bits as a girl.’ Was the next sickening thought, the room was starting to spin now and she was trying so hard to stay upright.

‘Someday soon you and Neil are going to realize you can’t work. You’re not a girl. He’s going to realize you can’t do things a girl can. When you’re an adult you can’t give him kids, you don’t even want kids, you would be a shitty parent just like yours and that’s something normal girls want. Normal girls want kids. From like the day they’re born.’ She was on her side now with no recollection of how she had got there, the thoughts just kept coming, the doubts.

‘This will be your life forever, longing for things you can’t have, with people you can’t have. You aren’t a girl, you could never be a girl, you have a penis you will always have a penis, girls don’t have penises.’ She thought, gasping through the tears.

“I don’t give two shits what you have.” The voice cut through the panic like a knife through butter. She blinked and she could see Neil, she could feel that she was being pulled into a hug but could not reply. “Girls can have penises too, and not all girls, even biological females, have boobs. Max, it’s okay… You’re perfect…. Max I’m not going to stop loving you just because you have a penis. Goddamn, I know you have one.” Max realized she must have been saying her fears out loud. “And not everyone wants kids, and not everyone has to be exactly a certain way to be one gender or the other…”

“How did you get so knowledgeable on the subject?” Max cried out her fingers finding purchase in the fabric of his sweater gripping it so tightly. She could feel herself gasping for air, hiccups bubbling up as she tried to get a hold of herself, the tears wouldn’t stop though.

Neil’s hand was rubbing her back the other wrapped around her waist hugging her tightly. “I did research Max so that I knew… so that I knew what would happen sort of… so I had some idea of what might happen between you and I because I really like you… and like it’s stupid because were only kids but I love you, Max….”

It took a few minutes to calm down, Neil rocked her back and forth in his lap. Their bodies swaying together as he rubbed her back and she clung to him like she might die if she let go. She could hear him tell her that it was okay, reassure her that things were okay. 

“So… your girlfriend?” She finally said to break the silence pulling back just in time to watch the blood rush to Neil’s face.


	12. Relax

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neil Manages to calm her down

“So… your girlfriend?” Neil heard the words and felt the heat rise in his cheeks as he scrambled for a response. In his panic to defend her to Tabii and to comfort her in her own panic, he had said a lot of things that he was suddenly so afraid of.

“I – uh… I am… Sorry? I didn’t think… I wanted to….” He stuttered along trying to get the right words, but before he could he watched her nose crinkle up and her tear soaked face shift into a laughing one and he felt his heart rate explode, he was pretty sure he was going to die.

She giggled loosening her grip a little on his sweater, taking deep gasps of hair between laughing and hiccupping. “You’re such a fucking nerd.” She eyed his face as she finally began to calm down. “I don’t hate it.” The words were a mere whisper on her lips, shared between just them. Neil stared down at her and the whole world seemed to slow, he could feel her lean up, but he was pretty sure his heart stopped the moment he felt her lips. They were warm and gentle on his cheek, he wanted to preserve that second into eternity, just live in it for the rest of his life. Her smiling face scrunched up nose and the light little kiss she’d placed on his cheek.

He didn’t care about the snot or the tears that may have been involved, he didn’t care that his shirt had a dark soaked spot where she had been crying against his shoulder. He cared that somehow he had gotten Max back from hysteria and had even gotten her to laugh, Neil didn’t think he’d ever have that many social skills for the rest of his life.

“I don’t want to go out and deal with people.” Her voice whined in his ear as she settled back into the hug, using him as a lifeline.

He went back to rubbing her back not sure what to say so instead he asked. “What do you want to do?”

“Lay here and watch you play video games all day.” She replied honestly and Neil didn’t care about the repercussions, instead, he just agreed. 

This time they settled in on the same cot under the quilt from David, Neil kept his arms around her giving her the DS instead. He insisted saying telling her he just wanted to watch her play, which was true, he wanted to watch her enjoy it and be happy.

They went undisturbed for the better part of an hour before David came looking for them. “Neil? Max? Nikki just told me she heard shouting over here earlier and I want to make sure you’re okay can I come in?”

Neil turned bright red, frozen in place where he was, almost unwilling to move, but Max wasn’t frozen, she didn’t seem to care. “Come in David.” She called not even looking up from the game she was now fully engrossed in.

“What happened Max?” David asked as he opened the tent and came in. He didn’t question the closeness of his two campers as he trusted them, he was more concerned that Max hated physical contact and was currently cuddled up with Neil.

Max finally looked up. “Neil’s creepy stalker Ex came to harass him and she….”

“Not my Ex,” Neil muttered but when Max seemed unable to finish what she was saying Neil piped up. “She was being a real judgemental and unaccepting asshole to Max and Max had a bit of a breakdown….”

David looked relieved and Neil only just realized what he must have been worried was actually happening over here. “well I’m glad everyone is alright-”

“EW GROSS DAVID NO!” Neil cut him off. “YOU WERE WORRIED THAT-“

Max started laughing again then. “If he was worried about it I bet he and Jasper did.” She teased obviously wanting to make the camp counselor uncomfortable. “Gross David neither one of us wants to do that disgusting adult shit,” Max grumbled. “Especially not after what I saw QM doing….” She shuttered cutting off that thought clearly deeply traumatized by the incident.

“We did nothing! I was just worried because of some kids your age in this time…. They do… and I don’t want….” David looked like a deeply concerned father then.

“David! Shut up! It’s gross and fuck off so I can go back to playing this game.” Max reached over and grabbed her own pillow throwing it at him.

David was hit with it in the chest but didn’t really react too much, he hugged it to his chest. “Promise you’re okay Max?”

“Yeah, I’m okay DAD.” She added salt to the word like it was supposed to be an insult but everyone in the room knew it wasn’t, Neil knowing better then to say anything if he wanted to stay there cuddled up with her while she played games.

David considered this for a long moment. “Fine you can stay for the morning but you should join us for the afternoon at least, you don't want to miss a lot of camp activities.” When Max nodded David gently tossed the pillow onto the end of her cot and left them there. “If you need me you know where to find me.” He was already trying to figure out how he was going to tell Jasper so that his boyfriend didn’t come running and tear the boy from their little girl, as Jasper had been calling her lately.


	13. Lunch Chatter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max and Neil make it to the mess hall for lunch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to my child, Happy birthday kid! you know who you are :P

At lunch, the two could no longer ignore their stomachs’ rumbling and finally had to leave the security of their tent. It was a little anxiety-inducing for both, they had only just arrived at camp and everyone was still unsure about this new Max. The other campers hadn’t caught on last year when they all had thought she was just growing her hair out to be annoying and rebellious towards David. 

When they entered the mess hall together both flushed and tried not to make eye contact with the onlookers as they made their way to get food. Once seated Max let herself glance around, she was sitting close enough to Neil that their legs touched and she took a mild comfort in that connection. Nikki was chattering with Ered, glancing over frequently and Max guessed she wanted to get away from the conversation to come sit with them. 

She took a couple bites of the mysterious sandwich before she looked up again, she saw space kid looking at her with big eyes, like she was a spectacle to look at. “Fucking Neil.” She muttered.

“What?” Neil beside her asked making an odd face in her direction.

She shook her head then nodding in the direction of the kid who wore a fishbowl on his head frequently. “Other, stupider Neil.”

“I’m glad you think I’m smarter.” She could hear the smirk in his voice, felt the faint flush to her cheeks but couldn’t bring herself to look up at him.

“Oh shut up, don’t let your head get too full of hot air, next thing you know you'll fucking float away and then you’ll never get to see my pretty face again.” She quipped playfully.

Neil groaned. “Fuck wouldn’t that truly be the worst thing in the world, not having to listen to your annoying quips all the time.” There was a tease to his voice that made her laugh quietly, she didn’t want to be too loud though, not wanting to draw attention it was not the same stunning laugh that Neil had grown to enjoy so much.

She bumped her shoulder against his again though like she had on the bus back to camp, pushing him enough to cause him to rock in his seat. “Admit it your life is boring without me in it.” She was so flippant when she said it that he almost missed the veiled insecurity.

“My life is completely devoid of entertainment without you, like seriously I am just some shitty nerd when you’re not around.” Neil tried to make himself sound casual before biting into his own sandwich.

He was rewarded with the hint of pink to her cheeks as she quickly went quiet and focused her energy on eating her sandwich.

After a moment or so of them quietly eating side by side Nikki finally came to join them at their table, ever a ball of sheer energy. “Heyguys!” she talked so fast it was practically one word. “You missed so much fun this morning! David taught us how to tap maple syrup from a tree! Did you know that It’s like super bitter when it comes out of the tree? David couldn’t get the spout into the tree right and Jasper had to save him and it was really fucking cute!” She gushed to the boys barely taking a breath between sentences. 

“Nikki, breathe,” Max said seriously trying to calm her down.

“Seriously though if you don’t breath in more when you’re talking you might actually be the first person in recorded history to talk themselves to death,” Neil added earning the smallest hint of a smile from a now sullen Max.

She giggled a little shaking her head at them. “You two are so ridiculous! Who needs air?!” she was practically vibrating in her seat.

“You ate a shit tone of sugary syrup didn’t you?” Neil pinched the bridge of his nose just below his glasses and let out a long sigh.

“Do you think you and Max will be like David and Jasper when you’re older?” She blurted out loudly, drawing the attention of everyone sitting around at the tables.

Max huffed getting up from her seat lifting her tray. “Fuck why do I even try, camp is always going to be shit no matter what happens.” She moved to walk away but Neil caught her arm and urged her back down into her seat, not removing his hand from her arm.

“Nikki we’re still a little young to think about that shit. Who the fuck knows what will even happen over the summer here at camp let alone next year or like when were fucking grown up?” he said bluntly and the straight cut of his words really eased Max’s nerves.

Nikki looked between them. “But you want to end up like them right?” She asked looking worried now.

Neil looked exasperated. “I don’t fucking kno-“ 

“Yeah.” Max cut him off. “I mean if I’m fucking being honest, yeah I want to end up like them. But we're just fucking kids, when were their age we might not even be the same fucking people. Who knows Neil might be in jail by then for murdering you because he couldn’t handle having an annoying step-sister.” Max laughed a little darkly standing up. “Who the fuck knows if I’ll even fucking live that long.” She grumbled and began to walk away.

“Max?” David’s voice was a little heartbroken at the tweens words. “What does that mean Max?”

Max shoved her tray into his arms since he was standing in the way. “I just mean if my shitty father doesn’t fucking murder me for being trans or whatever….”

David slowly placed the tray away on the little garbage stand. “Max… I don’t think your father would….”

“It wouldn’t be any fucking different then any other time he’s beaten me up, the exception being that this time he would actually want to kill me for damaging his reputation.”

“Oh, Max….” Both David and Neil seemed to chorus at the same time.

“Have you ever talked to anyone about it Max?” David asked gently. 

She hugged herself and shook her head moments before pulling into an emotional embrace by David. “It doesn’t have to be right now… but when you’re ready before you’re meant to go back home… please, lets talk about it okay?” He asked her softly getting a little nod out of her.

“David can I just go back to my fucking tent…. I don’t want to do anything this afternoon… maybe nap.” She said softly as she began to fight back on his hug.

“Yeah, Max…. but tomorrow I want to see you at breakfast okay?” He said finally letting her go. 

“Yeah, whatever…” She mumbled as she began to wander off, the redhead giving Neil permission to go off after the girl refusing to leave her alone incase something bad happened when she was alone.


	14. Found Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max finds her family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's finally a David chapter lol

“Jasper we have to do something….” The redhead said storming into the counselor cabin that night, before he could get another word out Gwen was storming through the door after him.

“What are we going to do about Max?” She asked placing her hands on her hips.

Both men turned to look at the Latin woman as she blew into the room like a gale force wind. “What do you mean?” Jasper was stunned, he didn’t know how to react to his lover and his friend.

Gwen rolled her eyes. “We are not letting her go back there with them right? We couldn’t possibly!” She shouted flopping onto the small shitty couch by the door.

“What did I miss today?” the dirty blonde man pushed himself out of the chair wrapping his arms around the redhead. 

David pressed in close closing his eyes tightly, hiding his face against the other man’s chest. “While you were helping space kid get out of his helmet at lunch Max admitted that her father physically abuses her… shes afraid he’ll kill her if she comes out.”

Jasper’s chest expanded as he took a long deep breath, his face pained when he heard that. “No…” His grip on his lover tightened a little. “I mean… we were already thinking about fostering right?”

“We would have to convince Max to tell someone…” David commented softly gripping the other’s shirt tightly. 

“We’ll figure it out, right Gwen?” Jasper looked to Gwen for support and she nodded. 

David pulled away looking up at the other swallowing tightly. “I’m not letting another trans kid fall through the cracks…. I won't let Max go, I won't let anything happen to her.” He said strongly. “I don’t care who I have to fight to keep her.”

Both counselors couldn’t help but smile at the third, he was like a little puppy trying to be a guard dog, too cute to be intimidating. Though Jasper knew that if it came to it he would be whatever he needed to be to get Max, and he would be right there to support his lover. “Max is coming home with us at the end of camp,” Jasper said confidently.

They settled down for a while making a plan talking about what would need to happen over the next few months to keep Max out of the system and from being at risk. 

When they settled into bed together, Jasper in his space invaded pajama pants that always managed to make David smile, except for this time.

“What’s wrong Davey?” He ran his thumb delicately over the freckles on his lover's cheek.

David sighed deeply. “What if Max doesn’t want to come with us?”

“Sweetheart… you can’t think like that. I know you’re worried about how angry Max can be all the time, but we make her happy, we keep her safe, she knows this… She would come live with us if given the choice.” He kissed the others nose gently closing his eyes.

Both men jumped in surprise when they heard a little knock on the door. “I’ll get it.” David hoped up and went expecting to see a disgruntled camper with a nightmare, which was partly correct, but the little girl standing there wrapped up in her quilt with her bear hugged close to her chest was the last camper either man expected to see.

“Neil is asleep… and I didn’t want to wake him….. but I… Had… I can’t sleep.” She stuttered her way nervously through the half-formed lie, Neil had been awake when she left the tent, she just really wanted the comfort of the two men. “Look I don’t have anywhere else to go so…”

David knelt down and pulled her into a tight hug kissing the side of her head. “Max… no, of course, it’s okay.” He ran a hand around her back in small soothing circles. He lifted her up, closing the door behind them, he was expecting her to fight being picked up. Instead, she latched on wrapping her legs around his torso out of fear of being dropped, her arms wrapping around his neck the bear being shoved against the side of his head while she buried her face in his neck.

He felt the small girls shuttering breath as her chest heaved and she began to sob, horrible ugly heartbreaking sobs of genuine fear and anxiety. They tore through David like someone had placed a swift kick to his gut, he barely made it to the bed, Jasper catching them both and pulling them into a big hug.

“Oh, Max…” His voice was so soft, afraid of breaking the very fragile trust there that came with the trust she had to cry around them.

Jasper kissed the top of her curly hair before tucking her head under his chin. “It’s going to be okay sweetheart. You’re going to be okay.”

“How can you know that?!” she sobbed her voice breaking as she cried out, lashing at them emotionally.

“Because you’re ours now, we’re not letting you go anywhere, you’re coming home with us at the end of camp.” He said it with so much confidence that it caused her breath to waver.

“how can you be so sure? They have money, they can make shit go away, they could make me go away and I would never be seen again and no one would be the wiser.” The fear of her parents was so powerful.

Jasper shook his head brushing her curls back from her face. “I don’t care who they are, David and I are ready to fight for you. You’re ours now.”

“WHY ARE YOU SO READY TO FIGHT FOR ME?! I’VE BEEN NOTHING BUT SHIT TO YOU….” He voice resounded around the stale cabin air, it hung like an oppressing heat against their chests, even Gwen who had shrunk under her covers, she was not apart of this conversation and didn’t want to interrupt. 

“We love you, Max, even if you lash out, even if you struggle. You’re our child, we love you…. This only reinforces that.” David said it with such certainty that it even surprised himself, he hadn’t been sure he was ready for a kid until he heard himself say it. “Now we need to get some sleep, it is important to keep our energy up if we are going to have a good summer and get through all the shit that we are going to face.”

That caused a grin to break onto Max’s lips. “You fucking swore!” she said in awe causing Jasper to laugh a little at that.

“He actually swears a lot when he’s not around you kids.” Jasper grinned watching the blush creep into David’s cheeks as they tried to turn the mood around a little. 

“That’s not true!” David tried to argue, watching as the girl crawled under the covers of their bed in the middle taking the quilt from his mother and Mr. Honenuts with her. David smiled at the sight of the bear, David had given it to her during Max’s first year with their camp, before he started dating Jasper before she had realized who she was before they started even liking one another, Maybe even before Max has started disliking David in the first place. It had been to fight off Max’s night terrors then, it was good to see she still had him.

“You staying with us tonight?” Jasper asked as he stretched out next to her pulling the blankets up around them.

Max didn’t even reply, simply cuddled up to the man who was more of a parent then her sperm or egg donor had ever been. David cuddled up on the other side and Max didn’t think she could ever feel safer then she did in the comfort of the arms of the two men she’d come to think of as her secret Dads, not that she’d ever tell anyone that fucking fact short of her deathbed. 

This was where she belonged, where she was happy, where she was safe and where she actually got a nights rest for the first time in years.

Safe.


	15. Emotional Supports

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max struggles with her emotions and realizes she's been alienating the people she cares for most

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry my posting schedule has been so sporadic this week! Back to regular posting from now on I promise!

She let herself hope, and that was incredibly terrifying to her.

Over the next few days as often as she accepted their care and affection, she lashed out, not knowing how to reciprocate their feelings. When Gwen did her hair she made some salty comment about how good her hair looked when the female counselor did it, so why was Gwen’s always so bad? This had hurt Gwen a lot, and she could see that but she felt incapable of making up for it.

When Jasper helped her with her activities one morning she’d quipped about how handy he was and how it was a shame he didn’t do more to help himself, like there was anything wrong with the curly haired counselor. 

Another morning David had comforted her during an anxiety attack, the other campers still weren’t talking to her normally, and Max had commented about how much David’s social skills had grown since they started camp. This was followed with a comment about how few friends David had.

No matter how hard she tried it was like one step forward and two steps back with each adult, she was so frustrated with herself that by the end of the week she was a blubbering mess curled up in Neil’s arms. He let her cry against his chest curled up under the quilt from David’s mother, something she’d started to use almost like armor. Neil did his best to comfort the girl about her failed attempts at getting close with the adults that wanted to love her more than anything, but try as he might he couldn’t fully understand the battle she was experiencing with her emotions. 

“Max?” Neil said very softly when she wasn’t calming down this time. “Max… Maybe it’s time you go talk to David about this…. Maybe… Maybe he can help you? Maybe it’s not as bad as you think? Maybe he understands?” 

“How could David ever understand?” She sobbed. “He probably thinks I’m just a piece of shit child, they tried so hard and I just shit on all their efforts.” 

He could feel the clench around his heart watching her in so much pain. “You never know unless you try to talk to him…” Neil gently tried to scratch at the back of her neck to calm her down but he wasn’t sure he was doing it right because it didn’t seem to be working.

“I don’t deserve the care you all give me… Especially not David…. Especially not you….” It was so hard for her, she could see what she should be doing and what she was doing wrong but she couldn’t seem to keep herself from the self-sabotage.

“Max?” There was a voice from the tent that at first neither of them recognized simply due to not expecting it.

She looked up in time to see the green haired girl coming in without waiting to be invited. “What the fuck are you doing here Nikki?” 

Nikki took her time considering what to say. “Space kid heard you crying…...” She admitted softly shuffling her bare feet against the floor of the tent nervously. “I just wanted to see if you were okay… I know you an Neil have been off in your own world lately…. But I miss my best friend and my Big brother….” The youngest looked at the ground like she was almost ashamed to admit it.

“Nik….” Neil looked at his soon-to-be step-sister and couldn’t help the guilt that swelled up in his stomach, but Max was the first to talk.

She pushed herself up hugging the blanket close to her chest. “I’m just fucking up everywhere…” The girl said pushing her hair back behind her ear. “Nik… I’m sorry we’ve not paid any attention to you…”

“Could I stay with you guys tonight?” Nikki winced like she’d said the wrong thing, quickly correcting herself. “You two.”

“You can still call us you guys.” Max chewed her lip. “I might not be a boy… but guys is sort of… just whatever right?” She said with a little laugh trying to smile through the tear stains. 

Nikki came towards them awkwardly looking at the way they had been cuddled up together blushing a little. “Were you two doing that weird stuff adults do?”

Max looked to Neil quickly and groaned. “What? No? That shit is gross why does everyone keep jumping to think that I want to do that?” Max shuttered a little. “I’m not sure I ever want to do that shit could everyone just fuck off.” Max’s little outburst had caused Nikki to jump, clearly a little on edge when it came to dealing with her friend.

“Max….” Neil tried to comfort her by setting his hand on her upper arm.

“S-sorry…” she said again before turning back into his arms closing her eyes. “I’m sorry…. I just shouldn’t be allowed to talk to anyone… The world would be better off if I just stayed mute.”

“The world would be way less funny if you didn’t talk.” Nikki piped up inching a little closer.

The curly haired girl glanced at the paler one and flushed. “I… I really appreciate that….” She looked to her empty cot over her shoulder and then up at Nikki. “You can have my bed tonight if you want….” She offered.

The youngest kid hopped onto the cot eagerly. “I was worried you were gonna send me away again…”

“I’m sorry I pushed you away,” Max said rolling over to look over at her.

She shook her head a little. “It must be pretty fucking scary….” The girl mumbled. “That’s why you’ve been so angry lately right?”

Max nodded her cheeks flushing a little with embarrassment. “I shouldn’t have taken it out on you Nik….”

The green haired girl leaned over and hugged Max, and while she wanted to pull away the older girl forced herself to hug back instead. She needed to stop lashing out every time she felt emotional…. And maybe this was a good first step. 

Nikki, Max discovered, was really good at making conversation about literally nothing and that was a pleasant distraction from the weight of the world that she felt so constantly. The curly haired girl fell asleep laying facing the green haired one, while the boy held her close. This wasn’t the first time the three of them had slept so close by, but something about it was different this time, they were closer this time. The support system Max was finding here at camp slowly was helping her, little by little, not only was she learning social skills she’d always struggled with, she was starting to accept who she was.

Max, while she’d accepted herself as being trans before, was finally starting to think of herself as a young woman. A young woman with people who genuinely cared about her.


	16. Sometimes That Liberal Arts Degree is Helpful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max goes to apologize

“I’ve said a lot of shit lately….” Max said standing outside the counselor’s cabin staring up at the roof with a deep sigh.

Nikki shook her head at the other girl. “Max, David will accept just any old apology, go ahead and just to say it.” She made a shooing motion in the curly haired girl’s direction. 

“But what if I went too far this time?” She mumbled nervously pulling the blanket tighter, she was wrapped up in the quilt like a few nights ago with the bear clutched against her chest. The plan was for her to go in there and make up with the adults who actually loved her for who she was, and stay there again tonight. 

“Max go,” Neil said giving her an encouraging smile before the two ran off leaving her there on the front steps.

Before she was ready to knock the door opened, the redhead going to leave the cabin but stopped short when he saw her there. “Max?” His voice swelled with the worry in his chest. “Max, What are you doing here? What’s wrong?

“I-I-I’m here to apologize to you assholes.” She brushed passed him and headed inside ignoring the looks of confusion as she climbed onto their bed again. “You all treated me so well…..”

“That it got scary and you didn’t know how to accept that care so you lashed out in misdirected energy?” Gwen piped up saving Max the struggle of working through her problems verbally.

“Fuck off with your shitty liberal arts degree and psychology major Gwen. Not everyone fits into your shitty little boxes.” She quipped nestling in amongst the pillows hiding away against them pulling her quilt up to hide her face more.

“am I wrong?” Gwen challenged back.

She shifted a little getting comfortable in the dead center of the bed. “No.” the voice was barely picked up by the adult’s hearing but Gwen grinned.

She could feel the bed shift under her as the familiar protective presence of a certain curly haired counselor appeared beside her. “Max….” His voice was steady and reassuring. “We appreciate the apology and the recognition that the solution to the problem may not be aggression… but we also want you to know that we don’t have any hard feelings and we love you, were made of stronger stuff than you think.” She could hear the smirk in his voice and it filled her with a hope which was quickly followed by panic.

“Even if I never change? Even if I treat you guys like shit for the rest of my life?” She peered up at him.

“The fact that you even ask, that you even worry about that proves to me that you care about whether you do or not. So I suspect you won't, but even if you did.” Jasper assured the little girl, gently rubbing her back.

Her teal eyes rolled at that and get let herself groan at her new gay dad’s loving words. “Why would I fucking care about you shit heads… I just worry about what my shitty life is gonna be like if I…. sorry.” She cut herself off and all three adults immediately felt pride that Max had grown enough to stop her outbursts. “Thanks…”

David came now sitting on her other side, running his fingers through those thick curls. “I would rather have you treat me like shit for the rest of your life than ever miss getting to see it, and all your milestones.” That ever cheery statement gave Max a chill, thinking back to her daydreams of them being a regular piece of her life.

“Yeah well someone has to keep you on your fucking toes.” She snapped, but when she felt his arms around her pulling her into a hug, followed by Jasper’s larger arms pulling her the other way she didn’t fight it, instead settling herself back into the middle of their beds. 

“Do you want to sleep here again tonight?” David had made it clear, he didn’t care who thought he had a favourite camper because it was obvious that the redhead would pick the girl who so obviously was their daughter. 

Max didn’t say anything, not bothering to confirm or deny it, instead, she let her actions speak louder and stretched out, cuddling up to the curly haired man. 

“Love you, Max.” The lovers echoed to their child.

“Love you too….” She couldn’t bring herself to say it yet, to call them what she thought of them, so instead, she would leave it implied.

It was the second time she had gone to them for comfort on this level, and it would not be the last time their parental love for her would get to be a lot, but they knew that no matter what they were a family now and that was inevitable. Their loving connection between parents and child the one thing in the world that made Max feel like maybe home might in fact still exist for her.


	17. Camporee

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max's relationships settle back in to normal with the other campers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This ended up being twice as long as I had planned... oops.... LOL

Nikki had been the first but over the following couple days, the other campers slowly started to trickle back into her life. They had begun to learn how to act around her, and when they didn’t any member of the trio were quick to correct them. 

Ered had no problem accepting Max the way she was and had even given her a compliment on her ‘rad style’ which only sort of strengthened their rivalry.

Space kid had gawked at her, and she had been very uncomfortable about any interaction with him really. Suddenly it was like he was trying to compete with her Neil, which had been solved when the curly haired boy had dragged the wannabe astronaut out behind science camp one day, Max hadn’t asked what transpired between them.

Preston had been all too quick to jump in and suggest plays that Max could be apart of, that had made her gag and outright refuse, she had little interest in being some heroine. Though when she had seen the after effects of that refusal and how upset the counselors had been she had begrudgingly agreed to be apart of something before the end of the summer with the condition that she got to choose.

Nurf surprisingly had nothing to say, he had no judgment to pass on her and had, had some respect for her courage. He had however given her a knife telling her that it was important for women to be able to protect themselves, that was something his mother had taught him that left Max both a little confused and concerned. None the less she had lost her knife a couple years back and had never been able to replace it so she appreciated having one now.

Nerris had given her a necklace that she said gave Max a plus one to charisma for dealing with the judgment of others. Max hadn’t entirely been sure what that meant but she knew that it meant a lot coming from the other girl so she’d accepted it without question. 

Harrison had tried to perform a magic trick on her that turned sour when he pulled out a long chain of scarves and on the end was one of Max’s training bras. Not only did he get into a lot of shit with Jasper when he found out about the incident Neil had outright attacked him for it, it was a pretty fucked up thing whether or not the trick had gone the way he wanted it to.

Dolf had been one of the worst to deal with, Max avoided him outright now around the camp, he might not have been completely open about his feeling but it was pretty obvious to all that he was uncomfortable about the whole thing. The things he said while not outright transphobic were still borderline. So Max avoided him, not that she had liked him anyways.

Some of the other campers had, had mixed feelings about the whole thing but no one else was really outright about any judgment that they felt towards the whole thing. She could feel their eyes on her most of the time but that didn’t keep her from settling back into the usual Max. She was still angry and aggressive and an outright asshole most of the time, except to Neil and she had even started to be a little gentler to Nikki. 

Things went pretty normal for a little while until they were faced with the wood scouts one day for a camp competition. The Flower scouts having already having known about Max appeared to treat her no differently than they ever had. Pikeman and his goons, on the other hand, were a whole other story.

“Where is your shitty little aggressive asshole?” The snot-nosed, acne covered brat shouted as they landed on the shore. “I want to fucking rub it in his nose when we win.”

“I’m right here asshole what the fuck do you think you’re gonna do this time that we can’t kick your ass at?” Max stood in front of him challengingly, she was dressed for the occasion in an outfit Gwen had picked out special and had, had to fight the boys into letting her wear. 

Gwen had gotten special underwear that allowed Max to pack in a way that let her wear tight athletic pants and feel comfortable. She was also wearing a cropped blue hoodie that had all the edges cut off leaving the edges frayed. She even had her hair braided back into a ponytail. In that moment she felt so confident about her gender that even the expression of confusion from Pikeman left her feeling invigorated rather than depressed.

She shoved her hands into her pockets shifting in her trainers with a little smirk rocking her hips. “Problem Pikeman?” she asked challengingly. “Don’t think you can fucking take me now?” 

Neil whistled in encouragement from behind her causing a slight flush to build on her cheeks but she laughed with excitement. She heard the distinct growl of the green haired girl that was more of a devil. For once, with Max’s direction, the campers were actually dressed and prepared for the competition.

“Damn Erin it looks like Max is out for blood today.” She heard the distinct nasally voice of the pink haired flower scouts head girl come up to the left of them.

“She does not play around with her style.” The taller scout agreed, the whole crowd watching as Pikeman’s cheeks grew redder with embarrassment as he struggled with his own thoughts and feelings.

Max rolled her shoulders, her expression shifting to purposeful boredom now as she looked upon the stunned teenager. “Are we gonna do this or are you just gonna stand there and gape at me all day?”

Neil stepped up a little, grinning, he felt imbued with Max’s courage. “Look I know she’s great to look at and all but could you maybe stop staring at my girlfriend? You’re really fucking creepy and she’s mine.” The curly haired man winked at the gross teen.

“M-Max is a girl?” Was all Pikeman managed to stutter out in shock.

“Yeah, and what the fuck of it?” She growled shifting her weight a little so that her body language leaned more to Neil for protection and support. 

“Have you always been?” The words tumbled out of the wood scout’s mouth before he could stop it.

Neil slid an arm around her waist and simply stared down the greasy teen. “That’s an ignorant fucking question to ask Pikeman if you have a fucking problem with it go back to your shitty camp and concede the win to us.” 

The curly haired girl was so taken by surprise at Neil’s brazen that her breath caught in her throat. Her heart leaped as she glanced at him out of the corner of her eye struggling to keep her expression from changing, but the butterflies that filled her stomach when she saw the proud set to his jaw forced the slightest ghost of a smile onto her lips. 

“Never!” the challenge snapped Pikeman out of his stun and he began to move again, getting off the boats and headed up towards the camporee. 

The wood scouts failed horribly, Pikeman had been so utterly distracted by the girl’s energy and vigor throughout everything that he stumbled over himself a lot. 

Max was far more energetic and invested emotionally in the competitions this time, whenever they would win or succeed she was grinning and even verbally cheering. Neil was breathless just watching the energy she had and was completely swept up in it, instead of being distracted he did better then he ever had. They creamed the other camps at most of the competitions for the first time ever. 

David was so very proud of the investment the girl was showing for once, his heart swelled with love for her.

When the wood scouts left camp Pikeman had tried his creepy false chivalry on her, trying to kiss her hand and when he had so much as touched her Neil had demonstrated that he wasn’t half bad at an uppercut. “Don’t fucking touch her you creepy motherfucker.” He spat watching him retreat like a cockroach that had been stomped on. 

___________________________________________________

When they got back to the tent Max and Neil were both riding adrenaline highs. “I can’t believe you fucking punched him like that!” She laughed as they entered the tent. 

“I can’t believe I did either! And I can’t believe how you brought the camp together for that!” Neil followed into the tent throwing his hands into the air with excitement. He wasn’t expecting what came next.

With a bounce to her feet she practically jumped towards him, He wrapped his arms around her expecting a hug, but when her arms slid around his neck she leaned up on her tippy toes and pressed her lips to his.

His whole body went still in a heartbeat that seemed to go on forever. It felt so good to hold Max in that moment he didn’t want to let go, he didn’t want the moment to end ever. If he didn’t know better due to science he thought his heart might burst from his chest, he thought his breath would never catch back up and that he would die from sheer bliss. But of course he was a man of science and after a moment or so he remembered to breath through his nose. 

She was practically vibrating with the energy she had bouncing through her body as their gentle lips connected, she was struck by just how soft his were, not quite what she’d been expecting, but more perfect than any dream. 

It didn’t last nearly as long as either had wanted it, but they both pulled back only enough to be able to stare at the other. Her chest heaved as she tried to regain the breath she had lost, her teal eyes meeting his brilliant sky blue, searching for some sort of reaction.

Neil’s hands tightened on the small of her back, holding her in place, mostly out of fear of her running away from the emotions in that moment, both teens hyperaware that because of the cropped nature of the shirt his hands were on her skin. “Wow…..” Was all he managed to get out breathlessly, of course, their first kiss hadn’t been the most amazing, but to the two of them it was so magical and charged with energy and emotion. 

“Wow good or wow bad?” she asked chewing on her bottom lip as she brushed a sweat stuck curl from his face. 

Neil very carefully lifted her by the way he held her and spun her around in a little circle, this managed to elicit the laugh from her that he loved so much with her little nose all scrunched up. “That was …. So amazing Max….”

She stared up at him, lifting her legs a little as he spun her and when she was sat down again she leaned up kissing him again. This time when she did her eyes watched him curiously, watching as he closed his own eyes almost the second their lips met. Neither were very good at it, but for kids it was everything, and when they would look back upon the memories years later it would always be cherished. 

“I should probably go get a shower,” Max said with a little awkward laugh. 

“Monster hunter after?” The nerdy boy asked, both were flushed deeply from the interaction and didn’t want to pull away. 

The smile lit up her lips once again. “You know just how to sweet talk a girl Neil.” She replied, the dark-haired girl being the first one to pull away a little regretfully. “Meet back here in half an hour?” She asked the paler boy.

“Sounds perfect.” He reached up and gently caressed her cheek where the blood had rushed to betray her and show just how much she felt for him. 

“Perfect.” Max echoed before retreating to the counselor's cabin to shower and gush to her new family about what had just happened.


	18. Emotional Rollercoaster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max experiences some serious dysmorphia, Trigger warning this chapter is very emotional about trans issues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> isn't procrastination such a good motivator? have another chapter

She didn’t knock this time, she practically kicked down the door instead bursting into the counselor's cabin with as much energy as he had, had after the camporee.

“Congrats Max! You were amazing today!” David cheered as soon as she saw her.

She raised a hand grinning brightly. “Hold your fucking horses.” She turned to Gwen who was stretched out relaxing on the couch, winding down. “You’re never gonna guess what just happened!” It was directed to the whole room but she wanted Gwen to guess.

“You kicked ass today?” She asked grinning brightly. “I don’t need to guess that I was there and witnessed it! And you looked on point!”

She couldn’t help but laugh at that, she was leaving her emotions unchecked in front of them for once. It made David’s chest feel tight to see her so genuinely happy and excited. “Not that you idiot! After that when Neil and I went back to our tent!” She replied with a grin, she was practically beaming.

“What happened?” Jasper sounded like an ever protective father, filled with worry when he asked.

“Did you….” Gwen started but wasn’t sure how to say it out of fear that Max might suddenly get shy.

But that wasn’t the case at all, she was so ready to share this with them, with her family. “We kissed!” She proclaimed with sheer delight. 

“No Way!” Gwen replied pausing her show and sitting up engrossed in the teen's sudden openness. 

“You did?” David and Jasper shared a look that was somewhere between concern, relief, and joy.

She bounced on her toes a little the way she’d seen Nikki do a lot. “Twice!”

“So then it was good?” Gwen asked wanting to be sure, Max seemed too energetic so of course, she was a little concerned that the girl had snapped.

She laughed again, that sweet laugh that lifted the spirits of all three of the others. “It was amazing! Anyways I need to use your shower! I’m so gross and sweaty from the day and I so don’t want to go to bed like this.”

David was so stunned that Max had made it through a sentence without swearing. “Yeah of course sweetheart.” He said with a small smile watching her as she went.

“Holy shit,” David said turning to Jasper he could feel the tears welling in his eyes. “She’s so happy…. I’ve never…. NEVER… seen her like this before….”

“You did good love.” Jasper pulled him into his arms hugging him close kissing at his tears lovingly. 

David shook his head slightly leaning into the hug. “We did well. It’s so good she is happy, it’s so good to see her happy.” 

They all settled in for a while Max showered, which was longer than anyone expected, to the point that David was starting to get worried. When she came out his heart nearly split in two, she was crying now. “Max, what’s wrong?” He asked fearfully.

“I-it’s… I’m not normal… I can never be normal….” She sobbed pressing her hands over her eyes, she was in her usual pajamas so everyone could see right away what the problem was. 

“Max… Max, it’s okay….” David rushed to her practically leaping over the chair in the way to get to her wrapping her up into his arms. “This doesn’t change you… you’re still you… you're still a girl.”

“I HAVE A FUCKING PENIS AND IT’S FUCKING AROUSED HOW CAN I EVER BE A NORMAL GIRL?!?!?!” her voice broke when she screamed, slicing through his heart like it was made of paper.

He hugged her tighter rubbing her back. “It’s okay Max…. it’s okay…. It won't always be like this.”

“BUT IT WILL, MY PARENTS WILL NEVER GO ALONG WITH THIS FUCKING NIGHTMARE.” She sobbed against his chest gripping at his shirt the dysphoria she felt so overwhelming she almost wanted to die. 

His grip tightened and he shook his head. “No, I don’t care what happens, after Camp you are coming home with Jasper and I, you will never go back there and you can get on hormone blockers and when you’re older… it’ll be okay I promise Maxy.” He said softly.

He let her cry against his chest until they all heard the knock on the door, everyone being knocked out of the tension that had held them all so stiffly in place. When Jasper answered the door Neil was stood there holding Mr. Honeynuts and looking a little terrified.

“Max didn’t come back to the tent like she said she would…. I just thought maybe…. She was upset with me…. I just thought maybe… if she was sleeping here that she would want Mr. Honeynuts…” He explained it out taking his time trying not to stumble over his words, trying to peer in.

Jasper stepped back and motioned the boy inside. “Come on in kid.”

“Max?” Neil’s voice shook as he looked to the girl who was clinging to David so tightly. “What’s wrong… is it… is it me? Did I do something? Am I not okay,…. If you… don’t want to do this with me anymore…. If the kiss… if you didn’t like it just say so…. Please? I can’t handle not knowing.”

“It’s not that idiot.” She said laughing dryly through the tears as she slowly turned to look towards him. When she saw him standing there clutching the bear, so caring and sweet that he would do that even though he was so scared she didn’t want to see him, it meant so much to her. She moved across the room to him and hugged him now instead, Neil latching onto her like he might not let go again. “I just….”

“It’s okay… if you don’t want to talk about it…. So long as we're okay…. But if you do I’ll listen it’s okay I’m here… I’m not going anywhere.” He whispered to her quickly and Jasper glanced at David remembering an incident similar to this when they were younger and David had come out to him.

“The kiss made me so happy….” She whispered softly. “Boy happy…. You know what I mean like ummm…. Things…. And….”

“And Dysphoria?” He asked, catching Max off guard.

“What’s that?” She asked not really sure what that word meant. 

Neil considered how to explain it. “Like…. Uncomfortable in your body….” He tried to simplify, earning him a little nod from her. “I’m sorry that you were uncomfortable…. That anything I did might have caused that…. We don’t have to ever do that again if that makes it better…. But it doesn’t change how I feel…. I know you have a dick…”

“What if I always do?” was all she managed to get out before she started to cry again.

“Then you’re a chick with a dick. Max, your gender is valid.” Neil tried to sound reassuring, he knew this was what she needed and he wanted to be able to validate her feelings for her.

“And will you still want me if nothing ever changes?” She asked, so afraid that he would reject her, that she would feel this way forever and be rejected by the boy she loved.

“Of course! I love you Max, you.” He assured her. “But I think David and Jasper are going to do everything to make sure you get to be comfortable….” He commented quietly glancing at the men who were hovering.

“Can we still play monster hunter?” she asked trying to distract herself.

Neil grinned and gently pressed the stuffed bear into her arms. “Whatever you need.” He assured her sliding his hand into hers. 

She paused to thank David before they returned to their tent where they spent the night cuddling while Neil watched Max play monster hunter for the first time. He did everything he could to comfort her as best as he could cuddling her and every now and then whispering what he hoped would be positive affirmations for her. He really had done a lot of research before coming back to camp, and that above all else was the biggest comfort to her.


	19. Their Third Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max goes for a night stroll

In the span of the summer, she shared 3 more kisses with Neil.

The third kiss they shared took time, after the first two and the resulting dysphoria she had to warm back up to the idea of being close like that again. 

She feared the feeling of arousal because of the anxiety that came with it so she never let herself feel it, carrying an elastic around her wrist and when she started to feel it she would snap it. She knew this wasn’t a great way to deal with her emotions but it was the only way she could think of. 

She also started taking walks after everyone fell asleep, in the dark of night once Neil was asleep she would slip out of bed and leave the tent alone.

One such night was when she shared her third kiss with him. She slipped out of his cot where he had fallen asleep cuddling, it was a bit of a task to get out from his arms without disturbing him enough to wake him. Once she managed it though she would pull on her pants, zip up her hoodie and slip into her trainers, pulling her hair into a messy bun before heading out into the crisp air. 

This night felt so good against her skin, the cool breeze that washed over her calmed her mind, bringing a gentle clarity to her thoughts. She would never admit it but walking along the hiking trail, surrounded by nature with the stary sky high above was like a religious experience for her. She thought about how David would react if he ever found out, his excitement that Max loved nature, she laughed then letting herself snort at it now that she wasn’t around anyone. 

The hiking trail looped around stopping at the top of a cliff, the edge of the ravine, into the clearing that looked almost like a magical kingdom and then back down around to the wharf. 

At the cliff she stopped to hang her legs off the edge, this had a nice view down over the camp and she smiled looking at the little tents that dotted along the grass outside the main buildings. Part of her wished they had cabins like the other camps did, but then she would be stuck in a more awkward situation then just her and Neil in a tent so she settled into the agreement that tents were best. 

She noticed the light come from one of the tents though from this distance she couldn’t tell whose, she imagined them stumbling around trying to get to the bathroom. She held her hand out blocking the light squishing it between her thumb and forefinger, pretending she had put out the light. She laughed as she imagined the other camper suddenly being plunged into pitch dark.

She got up slowly from her seat and headed back down the trail, at the ravine she always felt unsettled so she didn’t stop there long. Just long enough to throw a rock into it and listen with amusement as it tumbled to the bottom before scurrying along. 

In the clearing she always pondered the longest, stretching out sideways in the wooden carved throne she would stare up at the stars, putting in her headphones she would put on music with a shitty old MP3 player Gwen had given her recently. Gwen had put some of her own music on it and then got a list from Max to pirate. One of her favourites was World Gone Mad by Bastille, staring at the stars, thinking with that song at max was something she did often. 

Sometimes she would even sing along to it loudly, no one could hear her from there so she wasn’t afraid to really let herself sing. 

After a few songs, she decided to make her way around to the wharf, leaving her headphones in she walked all the way back there settling down on the edge swinging her legs as she stared down at the reflections on the dark hole that was the water below. 

She thought about what it would feel like, if she just slid off the edge of the wood she would plunge beneath the surface. The water would be so cold on a night like tonight she wouldn’t last long, her body would go cold and eventually, she could just slip beneath-

The dark thought was cut off by a hand on her shoulder, startling her out of her daze she slowly pulled her headphones off looking back at Neil. 

“Hey.” She said keeping nonchalant, trying to hide how surprised she was. “What are you doing here?” 

“What am I doing here?” There was panic in his voice which made her realize that he was sweating and completely out of breath.

“What’s going on? Is everything okay?” her brows furrowed together as she tried to figure out what would have him in such a state.

Neil groaned running his fingers through his hair. “How can you be so stupid sometimes Max? You just left… I woke up and you weren’t there, you weren’t even in the tent, I couldn’t find you, you weren’t at the bathroom or the counselors cabin…. The counselors are out looking for you! Everyone is scared shitless!”

She felt the heat rise to her cheeks with that and she felt her heart sink. “I’m sorry…” 

“You could have been dead! Wait what did you say?” Neil had started to rant again but he was so stunned by the apology that his voice faltered and he trailed off.

“I’m sorry… I didn’t think about how you would feel when you woke up… I just went for a walk, I do it when I can’t sleep, I’ve been doing it for a few years but I didn’t think about how it would affect you.” She gently patted the space on the wharf next to her for him to sit.

He was still stunned and staring at her slowly settling onto the wood, he didn’t know what to say, he’d expected her to tell him he was overreacting. He had expected her to be annoyed or upset at him for it… but instead, she was sorry?

He was so far in his head staring down into her eyes that he was not prepared when she leaned up and kissed him, no word of warning just suddenly she was kissing. 

After a moment the shock melted away, his hand sliding up to cradle the back of her neck, lacing his fingers into her hair to kiss her back. It felt so good to kiss her.

She didn’t run away like he’d expected her too, instead, she shifted a little closer to continue the kiss.

“MAX!?” The sound of Jaspers shout accompanied by the flashlight now illuminating her made her jump away from Neil nervously. “What the hell kid, we’ve been looking everywhere for you!”

Max shrugged a little slowly getting to her feet before she began to walk back towards her dad. “I went for a walk, it’s not a new occurrence, it’s just no one had noticed before… I’m fine, I just walk the trail, I’m going back to bed.” She said leaving both males stunned as she retreated quickly, she didn’t want them to see the blush on her cheeks or how embarrassed she was that Jasper had found them.


	20. Confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max takes neil for a walk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I haven't posted in a few days, it's been a rough week! I hope you will forgive me!

Their fourth kiss was in a moment they stole for themselves.

They were doing first aid camp, which Max would argue was probably the most important given how often people got hurt around camp. However, Max and Neil had done it a few years in a row by that point and neither really wanted to be there.

“Common.” She said tugging at his hand gently as she moved backward looking back towards him and the rest of the campers.

Neil made a face trying to judge if he should take the risk or not. “Jasper is going to notice the second you’re gone.”

She shrugged glancing over at her protective father figure, who was in fact looking at Max, noticing that she was splitting off from the group. “Let me notice.” She stuck her tongue out at Jasper with a wicked grin.

He made a ‘get back here’ motion with his hands.

She made a ‘fuck off’ motion with her middle finger which earned her a stern look, but Jasper didn’t appear to be making any move to actually stop her. “See look it’s fine.”

When she grinned at him, her eyes squinting just a little at the edges, any resolve he had simply melted away. “Where are you taking me?” He asked her with confusion thick in his voice.

“Just follow.” She instructed, and the firmness to her voice confirmed that she was not going to tell him. 

Despite knowing he shouldn’t, despite wanting to know where they were going first, despite the fact that if it was anyone else but her he would run, he followed. He would follow Max into the fiery pits of hell. He understood what the saying ‘to the end of the earth’ meant, regardless of the geographical error to it, when he looked at her. Not only did he trust her with his life, but with her he felt a reckless abandon for it.

When he looked at the tiny little Hindi girl in front of him, he was certain he knew just what love was, and it was terrifying. 

He followed her along the path, surprised when she led him to a hidden little spot on a cliff that overlooked camp. “Wow…” He said in surprise.

“Looking at it from up here it seems so small and insignificant…. It’s a wonder how something like that could have such a huge impact on my life.” Neil was pretty sure she had forgotten she was talking out loud when she’d said it, when he looked at her eyes seemed distant as she looked out at the valley. “Pretty isn’t it?”

“Yeah… you are.” He hadn’t really registered that she was talking about the valley but he wasn’t even looking at it anymore, he was completely engrossed in her.

Her nose scrunched up as she snorted and giggled. “You’re such a nerd.” When it registered that she was looking at him now, the paler skin of his face warmed as all the blood in his body it felt like rushed to his face.

“Sorry!” He said quickly not wanting her to get mad about it.

She shook her head quickly, the bob of curls that framed her face tumbled back and forth. “Don’t be, I think it’s cute.” She gently tugged him closer, pulling his arm around her torso, leaning against his chest to look down.

He never wanted to let go of her, never wanted to leave that moment, if he could he would protect her against the world that threatened to harm her. 

The moment ended far too soon, she was pulling him away now, back towards the path and another place. They passed an Erie gully, both being a little uneasy about getting too close to it. 

“This is the place that QM murdered that squirrel king.” She said, shuttering at the memory of the incident. 

“Why come back here?” Neil didn’t know the answer to that till she pushed past the bushes dragging him after her. It was gorgeous here in ways he didn’t like the shitty forest camp Campbell resided in could be. “Oh shit it’s gorgeous….” He glanced around and then back at her as she once again led him somewhere more. 

“Sit.” She said sternly gently pushing him towards the carved throne and he did, because he could not argue with her.

When he did though he was stunned when the over settled into his lap, resting her head again his collarbone. “This is nice huh?”

“Perfect.” He slid his arms around her, kissing the top of his head, he watched as she took out the iPod Gwen gave her. She pulled out earbuds, putting one in her own ear and the other in his, before settling in. She leaned in kissing his cheek while she took a selfie of them. 

As she experimented with angles, trying to find one she liked, she also practiced her poses, making them more feminine. 

For the last one though he caught her by surprise, nervously he caught her lips against his, this time he kissed her but that wasn’t a bad thing. She embraced and reciprocated then kiss quickly recovering in time to kiss back before he pulled away in a panic.

“Thank you.” He whispered when their lips separated, both staring at each other with a small smirk.  
She flushed back at him now embarrassed. “No no thank you… I really appreciate it.” 

“I really like you.” He breathed the words out, they felt good to say, though he was so scared she would pull away.

“I think I do too….” She replied with more honestly then she’d ever spoke before. 

Neil kissed her cheek. “No matter what you do… I will be there to support you.” Neil whispered watching just how delighted she was, feeling better about who she was becoming . 

“You have no idea… how much that means to me…” She slowly got to her feet again. “Okay walk time over, let's make out way back for food.” She smirked at the prospect of food, even though QM’s food was questionable at best, clearly hunger outpowering his wish to remain there with her forever.

“Sounds good to me.” He kissed the tip of her nose at that point. “Then maybe we could sit on the wharf.”

“Perfect.” Her nose scrunching up as she giggled very slightly.


	21. Things work out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max and Neil share a final kiss of the summer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like this Max has really developed as a character, if you have any particular events you want me to write out feel free to comment and I may just do it.

Their last kiss was the night before the end of camp.

“So you’re not going home tomorrow?” Neil asked, his voice laced with obvious concern.

Max though was grinning from ear to ear. “I’m going home with David and Jasper!”

“I never thought I’d see a day where you were excited for that,” Neil admitted wrapping his arms around her, it had been a few weeks since the last time they had shared a cot and he’d be lying if he didn’t admit he had missed it.

“I will not hesitate to suffocate you in your sleep if you tell them that I’m excited.” Her face showed no sign of sincerity which was comforting but Neil understood what she meant.

He shook his head running his fingers through her curls. “So… you won't have to cut your hair off this time….” The expression plastered on his face made it so clear how much he loved her hair.

She giggled for the first time in weeks too, it had been a rough few, she had spent a lot of time in the counselor's cabin as David and Jasper did everything to take Max in. They would be fostering her until she either came of age or decided to be adopted, or at least that’s what David and Jasper said constantly. Max, on the other hand, held doubt in the back of her mind in the form of a third option, one where David and Jasper grow tired of dealing with her and her shit and she ends back out on the street alone. This doubt had planted a seed that had grown into fear. 

She had, had to talk a lot about the shit she’d gone through with her parents and show off parts of her body that made her uncomfortable. She was subjected to so much questioning that David had exploded at the social services lady, no one in camp had ever heard him so angry. The social services lady had scolded David telling him he shouldn’t be so loud or aggressive around Max given her past, but Max had used David as a shield. It had taken a lot for her to trust that he wasn’t going to turn on her, that he was defending her.

The most exhausting thing about the week wasn’t the extensive questions, it was the endless misgendering, and was probably what cause David to explode. The entire time she was talking with them she was calling Max by male pronouns, and it was visibly chipping away at her hardened exterior to the point that she even let David see just how much it was eating her alive.

Right now, though, she was relaxed, at least for the moment, and he would bask in the light that shone from her. It had been a rough week, and to see that she could still smile after all that gave him just a little hope. 

“And I won't be that far away again….” She commented softly. “Not like last year… I’ll be at the same school, within walking distance, we don’t have to spend a whole year not talking….”

Neil smiled at her. “We never spent the whole year not talking in the first place, but I get what you mean.” The curly haired boy kissed her cheek with a blush, he could only be so bold and he had already kissed her of his own accord once.

“We could go on a real date….” The words slipped from her mouth before she could stop them and suddenly she was pulling away, not physically but emotionally, afraid to be hurt.

He hugged her closer, resting his hands on her back reassuring her as best he could. “I want that, Max I do.”

“But?” She choked on the words because much to his surprise she was crying.

“No buts, cept your cute one.” Neil managed to get a choked laugh out of her as he felt her arms wrap up around him from underneath gripping on tightly. “You’re my girlfriend, I want to go to the movies with you, and hold hands in the hallways and hang out at the library together.”

That was enough to earn him a snort, and though he wasn’t looking at her, he could just picture the expression she was making. It was short lived though as she was struggling with her self-confidence more than anything else. “What if I can’t be like this out there? What if I have to be a boy-“

“David would fucking murder someone.” Neil cut her off. “If anyone stood in your way… I have never seen David out for blood before this week, but he might very well stab anyone who tried to deny you.” He took a deep breath and for a moment she’d thought he’d finished but he barreled on. “Max I would do all those things with you, boy, girl, whatever, that doesn’t matter to me because I love you. You’re my Max, and no one will make me give that up. I don’t care what mom thinks, I don’t care if kids at school stare, I don’t care if I have to jump through a firey hoop 30 feet in the air and risk certain doom if it somehow kept me with you….”

“I love you too….” Her response was so much of a whisper and Neil was still processing what he had just said himself that it took a solid five minutes for him to register what she said.

“You do?” he asked pulling away slightly looking down at the girl that he thought was so perfect in so many ways. 

Instead of replying the small girl leaned up and kissed him, and it was as good as the first they had shared in that tent but less sloppy. “Is it okay if I sleep in your cot tonight?”

“Of course…. I was really hoping you would….” Neil admitted, he felt her lean against his chest and yawn, it was their last night sharing a tent together for the year and Neil wanted to enjoy it as long as possible, but they were both so tired. He settled down and pulled her close against his side figuring she would fall asleep quickly.

Which is why when she spoke up again a few minutes later it came as a surprise. “What did you mean, you don’t care what your mom thinks?”

“I haven’t seen her since last year, shortly after I came home from Camp… I came out to them, my dad and my mom.” He started explaining, his hands started to move absentmindedly stroking her hair as they lay there.

“Came out?” Max asked a little surprised herself now and confused.

“As Pansexual with a trans girlfriend, it was a bit of a shock to mom… She shut right down… but dad, he surprisingly supported me… He hasn’t always been the best father but this last year he really came through for me.” He stared at the roof of the tent, the words of his mother echoing in his head. “You’re just a kid! You have no way of knowing your interests and you shouldn’t hand up on some twisted child’s fantasy of being female. It’s not healthy to put yourself into that situation, Neil.” He spoke the words out loud perfectly practiced like he’d gone over them too many times in his head. “He doesn’t have to be 18 to know who he is, that’s not how this works. If he loves this little girl, why should we stop him from a life he wants to have with her, however long or short.” Neil rolled a lock of her hair around his finger, twirling it. “It was surprisingly supportive… and I am very thankful to have at least one parent who won't throw me on the streets…”

“Your mother is stupid for not wanting anything to do with you because of that…” Max yawned again, the tired from the stress of the week finally hitting her like a brick wall. “Night Neil…”

“Night Max, sleep well….” He murmured back watching her while she slept in his chest.


	22. Summers End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max and Neil make plans, Max overcomes some social anxiety

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These two are so cute I think I could write this fic forever

They had ridden the bus back to the pick-up point much like they had on the way there, nestled in the back corner holding hands, this time, however, things were much more pleasant. There was not anxiety relating to stares from the others, instead, they had gained the near full support of the camp save for a camper or two. 

Nobody had said it out loud or acknowledged it but after the camporee, Max had slowly become a leader amongst the other kids, David and Jasper were so proud of her. 

When they arrived at the drop off point Max didn’t want to get off the bus, she froze, the anxiety hitting her in a wave.

“Max it’s okay…” Neil said standing up slowly. “You can call me as soon as you get settled in, we can hang out whenever you want.”

She shot up wrapping her arms around him tightly. “I’m kinda scared…” She admitted very quietly, she didn’t care who saw her like that right then, the anxiety was overwhelming.

“It’ll be okay because you will have me with you.” Neil insisted wrapping his arms around her as well stroking her hair.

She nodded quickly and pulled away from the other, wiping at her eyes quickly with the back of her sleeve before anyone could notice. 

“Hey look, we’ll fucking own that school, okay? They’re all fucking idiots there anyways okay? And you and I will blow their fucking minds with how cool we are.” Neil gave her a proud grin, trying to give her as much courage as he could muster.

She snorted again laughing at him, she looked him up and down with a frown. “Not in that outfit, maybe we should go shopping before school, you know, to make sure you’re good enough to be seen with me.” She waved at herself, she was actually wearing a light knit shirt that fell off her shoulder and jeans instead of hiding behind her sweater.

“Nik too, her school clothes are kind of a mess, and we wouldn’t want to embarrass you.” He leaned down and kissed her cheek, over the summer he had just gotten taller, she still had yet to hit a good growth spurt. 

She nodded glancing at Jasper nervously, then out at the people who had made it off the bus and were reuniting with their parents. “Maybe we could go to the mall next week?” She suggested looking back to her dad for his nod of approval.

“Common kids, last ones off the bus.” He said motioning them to follow him before descending out to deal with the parents.

Neil went first grabbing his backpack, then her hand and making his way down the aisle. As they descended the stairs Max tugged on his hand drawing his attention when he was at the bottom.

Neil turned to look at her hoping she was okay, he wished he could stay with her a little longer at the very least. When he turned Max made a bold move leaning forward and kissing him for the first time in front of a bunch of people. He slid his arms around her waist as they kissed and when she pulled away he used it to lift her up, she had her arms around his neck and lifted her feet up letting him easily spin her in a circle. People narrowly dodging getting hit with the careless teens feet. 

“Do you want to come meet my dad again, properly this time?” Neil asked when he finally placed her down again now a solid five feet from the bus. 

Max glanced over where Candy and Carl were standing with Nikki, Candy was paying attention to her daughter who was talking animatedly, but Carl was looking over at them with a warm and compassionate smile on his face. “I still need to say goodbye to Nik so I guess I might as well…” She did want to meet Carl, she wanted to meet all of Neil’s family which was kind of a scary feeling to her, she’d never had a desire to actually know another person before. She even wanted to meet Neil’s mother, because even if she was transphobic and an ignorant cunt, she was still someone Neil loved and maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.

Neil led her over by her hand and Max was trying her best not to get defensive or shy, she felt like she needed to make a decent impression on the man.

“You must be Max?” The balding man said offering her a hug which she awkwardly accepted, she wasn’t a hugger, and she was sure she looked uncomfortable to everyone else around, but this was important.

When they parted she stepped back beside Neil trying her best not to back out of there as fast as possible. “Yeah, I am.” She said trying to keep her tone level and her attitude down. “It’s nice to see you again Mr. Walsh.”

“Now, now Max you can just call me Carl okay? I’m only Mr. Walsh at school.” The smile he gave her was free of judgment, it was warm an inviting and Max wanted to run away from it, but she planted her feet and forced herself to stay. 

‘For Neil.’ She reminded herself silently before continuing. “Okay Carl.” She tested the name awkwardly glancing to Neil who was utterly beaming, she had made the right choices, this was making his life and she needed to keep it up. The smile on his face made it just a little bit easier to bear.

“So I hear you’re coming to live by us now, going to the same school as Neil and Nikki huh? Hopefully you three wont get into too much trouble.” Carl’s smile was almost knowing like he didn’t actually expect them not to. “I’m glad to hear it really, last year was a strain on Neil, he spent so much time worrying about you, he barely slept all year.” 

Neil turned as red as David’s hair all the way down his neck. “Daaaaaadddd.” He whined but it only made Max laugh, it was a real laugh and all the awkward tension in her body melted away when her nose wrinkled up.

“Hey just so you know our door is always open, you are invited over whenever, you just promise me if you do anything you’re safe about it.” He said turning a little serious with the last part.

It was Max’s turn to blush. “Uh… Mr. Walsh… I appreciate that and I’m sure I’ll be over until you’re sick of me… but also I’m not ready for anything like that anytime soon and I don’t think Neil is either…. So there won't be anything to worry about… just cuddling.” She assured him quickly, she wanted him to know that they could be trusted together.

Carl laughed a little at that, he was clearly pleased by her answer. “You’re a wonderful girl Max sweetie, I am glad Neil found such a delightful partner and I’m glad you’re forward with your intentions with my son.” Everything that Carl said felt so good to hear, for someone other then her dads and Gwen to call her a girl and sweetie and just genuinely being positive about her being a girl was like a revelation for her. This time she hugged him and it caught the man by surprise but he hugged her back.

“Thank you, Mr. Walsh.” She said quickly and turned to Neil giving him a quick hug and another kiss on the cheek. “I should really be getting back to my dads…. It was nice seeing you again… see ya soon Nikki.” She quickly slipped away with a final wave retreating up onto the bus again.

“Max?” Came a voice a few minutes later.

She sniffled trying to rub away the tears as she uncurled from the first row. “What?” She shot towards the curly haired dirty blond man.

“You okay kiddo?” He asked settling down beside her. “Is it going separate ways? You’ll see him soon.”

“No no… it was just… Mr. Walsh… he called me a girl… and it felt so….” She struggled to find the right words to explain.

He nodded slowly grinning at that, he wrapped an arm around her gently and pulled her close. “right?” he filled in for her which earned him an awkward nod. “You’re the most perfect little girl.” He assured her kissing the top of her. 

“Daddd.” She said trying to swat away the kiss, her cheeks becoming rosy with embarrassment, but she leaned into him with a little sigh. “Yeah….” She chewed her lip. “Am I really going to get to be a girl?”

“You really are a girl,” Jasper said with a little nod. “But I understood what you meant, and yeah, we have an appointment for you tomorrow to go see David’s gender therapist… We're gonna get you everything you need sweetie.” She didn’t know how to process that much support and affection so instead, she went quiet, remaining that way the whole drive back to camp.


	23. Pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max deals with the social pressure of having people who care

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy smokes! One kudos away from 100 thats crazy! Thank you so much I deeply appreciate it!

“Finally! Something other than a yellow fucking cab.” Max said eyeing their Kia sedan as she hauled her shoulder strap further up adjusting the weight of the bag. 

Jasper beamed, he was not the one to correct her on her language and David was out of earshot so why not let her have this moment? “Never again kid.” He said reassuringly as he carried her duffle bag over and tossed it in the trunk along with their luggage, most of her clothes hadn’t fit in the duffle so they were wedged in their much larger bags. 

The girl pulled the door open for the back seat and tossed her bag in inspecting it curiously. “Are we going to be on the road for fucking ever?” She closed her door again leaning back against the car instead of getting into it just yet, she wanted to take in as much fresh air as she could before being trapped with her nerd fathers and Gwen for hours. 

“It’s about an hour and a half drive, not too long, but long enough that you’re probably going to get bored,” Jasper replied turning in time to see the other two counselors making their way towards the car from locking up the last of the amenities. 

“So whose stuck in the back with Max?” Gwen said playfully as she looked to David. “Rock, paper scissors it?” She lifted her hand up and set it on the palm of her other hand getting into an almost fighting stance.

“GWEN!” David cried out in surprise. “If you really don’t want to sit in the back seat with her then I will!” Of course, David was more than happy to sit back in the back seat with his daughter.

“Fuck can I fight you for the front seat?” The tween groaned not wanting to be stuck with her redheaded father figure in the back seat for an hour and a half, this was going to be sheer torture.

They began to climb into the car, once David had settled down into the seat first and grinned brightly. “Can we listen to the Farmer's Almanac?” 

“NO!” 

“FUCK NO!”

“Babe… PLEASE NO!” 

The three shouted at the same time.

______________________________________________

The drive felt centuries longer then David had said, they let Max pick the music for a bit but when that got depressing David put on his own music when that good too cheery Gwen played a happy medium. 

They stopped for a fancy breakfast at some diner on the side of the road, Max was a little overwhelmed with choices and ended up just getting the same thing as Gwen. She was amazed by the giant fluffy pancakes piled high with whip cream and fruit, Gwen even let her drown it in maple syrup which she had never had before. She had audibly moaned when she took a bite of it, never having had anything nearly as delicious as that was. She had flushed with embarrassment when that happened and tried to show less interest in the food after that, though her companions all knew the truth.

She knew it hurt them, glancing around the car now at each person absorbed in whatever it was they were doing. Gwen had headphones in now too and was drawing away at a notebook that was filled with very odd and random doodles. David was reading a book with his feet up on the dash, his knees pulled up. Jasper’s eyes were on the road where they should be as he drove, he was bouncing a little in his chair to the beat of whatever music David had put on when they got back into the car. All of them only had an inkling of the life she had before, and the idea of it hurt them each in different ways. 

She didn’t want that, she didn’t want them hurting over the idea of the pain she had gone through, there was so much pain in the world that she didn’t want to cause them more. So she hid it away, the inklings that led them to understand things she’d gone through, but she’d let one slip at the diner and for that, she felt guilty.

She looked down at herself feeling like she might vomit the delicious breakfast back up, she suspected it wouldn’t be as good this time around. Her stomach flipped with guilt as she fiddled at the iPod, she was putting them through so much… Why did she have to cause them pain too?

Suddenly her headphone was being pulled out by a pale slender hand. “Max?” She looked up to see the freckled redhead had taken his seatbelt off to lean back towards her.

“What?” She was confused as to why he was suddenly interrupting her thoughts, the car was still moving so it wasn’t that.

“Why are you crying?” The pain on his face was clear to her and her heart dropped through her stomach.

She reached up touching her own face realizing her fingers came away wet. “I-I’m sorry!” she said quickly. “I’m okay… put your seatbelt back on….” Anxiety was rising her voice, what if something happened and David didn’t have his seatbelt on because of her?

“Max… I’m okay for right now… can you talk to me, please? Tell me what’s wrong?” The softness in his voice changed how she saw his expression, it no longer looked pained, it was empathy, it was that he felt for her.

She curled into herself a little drawing her feet up onto the seat hugging her knees. “I’m just a burden on you…. I’m a pain in your side causing you problems-“ 

Before she could continue the man cut her off. “No.” his voice was stoney but not rough. “Max, No.” He shook his head. “Max… We love you, you’re just a kid…. You shouldn’t have to carry that much weight on your shoulders…”

Max shook her head the curls bouncing with it. “I see the way you look at me when I do things like… um… that show you all of my problems… it hurts you! I hate that!” she cried.

“Max it hurts because we care about you because we hate that you ever went through that at all. It would hurt us more to not have you here right now.” He replied smiling at her with his gentle and caring expression. 

“I-it would?” She asked more than a little surprised by that. “Can you put your seatbelt back on?”

David laughed and leaned back pulling the belt across his body. “Yeah Max, we are so happy to have you in our life, I promise.”

The made her feel a little better. “Thanks…” she mumbled turning back to her music for the remainder of the drive.


	24. Swing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max and David take a moment when they get home to wind down

The house they rented sat on the edge of a lake, because of course it did, David loved nature and Max was pretty sure if he was more then 10 km from a body of water for an extended period of time David might actually die. She didn’t even bother trying to help carry anything in, instead she walked through the gate and into the big yard. There were garden beds set up in a little fenced in area, but they were not in use since the residents of the house had been gone for the last three months.

Max walked down a path that was carved into the grass that led to a porch swing hung from a large old Oak that sat just up from the little wharf. She kicked her shoes off and curled up on the swing, the wind of the water making it rock back and forth as she settled. It was a quiet little spot that left her secluded from everyone which she needed after the long car ride with all of them.

It was a while before she heard her dad approach, his steps were almost silent so it didn’t surprise her when she noticed he was shoeless. “Max?” His usually chipper voice was more gentle than anything else, testing to make sure she was okay.

She turned her head and managed a weak little smile at him, trying her best to be a decent human being to one of the men who had just taken her in. “Hey.”

“You okay Kiddo?” David climbed onto the swing with her pulling her feet into his lap he draped a blue blanket over both of them which was a nice reprieve from the cold wind off the water.

She looked back over the water letting her face go blanket again, keeping up the smile was more then she could do. “Yeah…. It’s just a little overwhelming… being here, with you guys away from…” She could feel his eyes on her, and though she couldn’t bring herself to look at him she could sense the face he was making. “It’s okay, I’m happy… to be here I really am. It’s just going to take some time getting used to okay?” 

He reached out wrapping his arms around her and pulling her into his lap hugging her tight. “I know Max, I’m sorry. I’m glad you’re here with us and I’m so happy to have you be apart of our family, I forgot to stop and wonder how you feel about the whole thing…”

“No you didn’t, you thought about it like a hundred times David, you just feel guilty cause you think for some reason that I am not happy to be here. We already had this fucking conversation David, in the car a few times.” She didn’t pull away, instead she hid her face against her dad’s neck and wrapped her arms as far around him as she could get them, she still hadn’t reached any major growth spurt so she was still fairly small. “Dad… Can we just stop talking about it now? What’s done is done and I’m way better off here then I am anywhere else. I get to be myself here, I get to be with Neil here, I get to be you and Jasper’s daughter which is still a weird thing to me but I’m sure I will get over it eventually. Although someday you’re gonna have to fight over who gets to walk me down the aisle.” She smirked at that.

The last part did not have the desired effect, instead of arguing that he would do it David started to cry. “Oh golly Max, I don’t mind if you want to pick Jasper, I just can barely even wrap my head around the fact that I get to be there to witness that someday.” 

Max couldn’t help but groan pulling away to wipe at his tears. “You need to fucking stop that before I start to cry, and you know I fucking hate crying.” She hissed leaning up and kissing at his cheeks hoping It would make him stop, she’d seen Jasper do it before.

“Max you’re such a great kid! Better than any dad could ever ask for!” He exclaimed to her softly. “My mom is coming soon… are you up to meet her today or do you want to hide out for a while?”

This stunned Max for a moment or so, she never had a choice before when family came over you didn’t ignore them in his biological parent's house, She had had to entertain them for as long as they wanted. She also had to answer every single question with a polite answer but something told her that wasn’t the same here either. “Uh… I don’t mind coming up…. Since you asked…” in truth she respected that she was given the choice, and that paired with the things she’d received from David’s mother she really wanted to meet her.

Max was the first to get up from the swing, instead of putting her shoes back on she picked them up, together they walked side by side barefoot back to the house. She wiggled her toes in the grass curiously, it was an unfamiliar feeling but it was kind of fun. They slipped in through the sliding glass door that led to kitchen from the back deck, the bottom floor sliding glass door Max was informed, led to Gwen’s little bachelor pad in the basement.

Max went to the bathroom to freshen up before David’s mom got there, or rather to psyche herself up before meeting someone she had to make a good impression on, considering she was about to be an important person in her life.


	25. Maxine Miller

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max decides on a name, Neil becomes that embarrassing 13 year old boyfriend

Yvette was not the woman that max was expecting her to be, in her head she was just as annoyingly happy as David was, but as it turned out she was a calm and loving woman. 

“You’re dating your mother.” Max said the moment after she and Yvette had pulled away from each other.

“What?” David stared at the little girl in more than mild confusion, this comment though had caused Jasper blush deeply and Yvette to break down laughing.

She lowered herself into a chair with grace and smiled over at them. “I like her, she’s smart.” 

“I think that was the greatest compliment I have ever received in my life….” Jasper whispered as he carried over a tray of snacks and lay them out on the coffee table. 

David was still standing there stunned, his eyes flicking between Jasper and Yvette with confused worry. “I’m still not sure I follow.”

The ginger haired woman snorted as she twisted her hair up and clipped it in the back in a way that made Max ogle, it was such an impressive move that she wanted to learn how to do it. It was so simple and feminine that Max felt a pang of jealousy, she wished she could be effortlessly feminine like that. She awkwardly pulled her hair elastic off her wrist and pulled her ball of curls up into a bun before nervously climbing onto the couch.

“Max is saying that I remind her of Jasper,” Yvette explained to her son with a small smile. “and implied that, that was the reason you’re so attracted to him. Which I cannot lie I do agree with.”

Jasper continued to blush as he settled onto the other end of the couch from Max and smiled at the woman. “Thank you Mrs. Miller, if there was anyone in the world I hoped I was like it is certainly you.”

“Miller?” Max made a face at that testing the name on her lips. “So David’s name is… Miller?” she started to giggle. “David Miller?”

“Don’t laugh kid, cause it’s gonna be your last name too.” David replied teasingly causing the teen to scowl.

“Maxwell Miller?” She tested the name on her lips but it still felt foreign.

Yvette offered up a better name that even Max had to admit wasn’t terrible. “Maxine Miller?” The name sounded better to Max’s ears and it made her heart skip a couple beats as she was reminded again that she got to be female. 

“Is that what you want us to register you for school under?” Jasper’s voice cut through the heavy silence after a moment or so.

Max shoved her hands in her pockets trying to look nonchalant about it, she didn’t want to seem over eager about the name change. “Yeah, sure, whatever is easiest for you.” She knew very well that anything other than Maxwell would be a struggle to get and she wasn’t sure she would get anything other than that.

“Maxine Miller.” David repeated with a brilliant grin. “I think I really like that.” He brought over glasses of lemonade for everyone before he settled into the other chair between Max and his mother. “Is that the name you want when we fill out the adoption papers?”

Her heart raced at that, her stomach doing a huge flip that made her feel like she was about to be physically sick.

MAX: “How do you feel about Maxine Miller?”

NEIL: “Depends on who that is.”

MAX: “As a name…..”

NEIL: “How do you feel about Maxine Miller? Wait is David’s last name really miller?”

MAX: “I asked you first….”

MAX: “Wait what makes you think that isn’t Jasper’s name?”

NEIL: “Because it kinda fits David really well.”

MAX: “ANYWAYS The name, what do you think about it?”

NEIL: “I think in the end it doesn’t matter what you’re last name is.”

MAX: “What?”

NEIL: “Well you know”

MAX: “What are you on about?”

NEIL: “Eventually it’s going to be Bishop.”

MAX: “STFU THAT’S NOT HELPFUL RIGHT NOW.”

Max felt herself blush furiously, the stomach flip had morphed into hundreds of tiny butterflies swarming her stomach, this was so stupid. 

“Max?” Jasper was very visibly concerned about the little girl.

MAX: “Maxine Miller… is that? DO YOU THINK THAT’S OKAY?”

NEIL: “Yeah Max, I think it’s perfect.”

She let out an exasperated sigh before puffing up her cheeks giving her phone the death glare while she tried to settle her own emotions. “Yeah I’m okay… that name… is perfect.” She agreed. The next text message she got was a screenshot that made her shove her phone viciously in her own pocket.

The image was of her contact information in Neil’s phone which boldly proclaimed MAXINE BISHOP. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Jasper asked again, she was grateful that he didn’t try to peak at her screen or anything, that he trusted her.

She rolled her eyes and huffed a little. “Neil is just being embarrassing is all.” This rose small laughs out of the adults in the room as they all grasped a small piece of understanding.

“Maxine Miller.” Jasper echoed with a small smile.

Max looked up at him. “What about your last name?” She asked accusatorily.

“It’s Macintosh, but I plan on changing it to Miller once Davey and I get married.” The wink that Jasper gave the redhead made his cheeks match his hair and now Max was laughing at her father. 

It was such a simple conversation, but the confirmation of her identity was so overwhelming that she had to go take a nap once Yvette was gone and just decompress away from everyone, especially Neil and his embarrassing, stomach lurching, heart-stopping shitty romantic texts.


	26. Trip To The Mall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max, Nikki and Neil go to the Mall shopping

Max took time to settle in at David’s, they let her pick a colour for her walls and together they painted the pastel blue on her walls as a family. Together they hung string lights and tulle from the ceiling and got her bedding to match, though she kept Yvette’s quilt folded on top at the end of her bed. Slowly it started to feel like home, like somewhere she was proud to say she lived. By the time the weekend rolled around she was ready to face the world and go to the mall with her boyfriend and best friend. 

When the horn of Neil’s father’s shitty car sounded in the driveway she grabbed her backpack and ran out of the house without another word. She was happy there but she had to get away from David, it had been 4 days of nonstop David, it was enough to make anyone insane. 

“Finally.” She shouted as she practically leapt into the scrawny boy's arms. He laughed as he caught her around the waist moving in a circle to defuse the momentum she had caused with the speed at which she’d launched herself at him. 

“I missed you too.” He said with a laugh, he had her lifted up a little bit so she was actually above him for once, it helped that she was light as a feather but he wouldn’t be able to hold her there too long.

She placed her hands on either side of his face and leaned down kissing him, something that caught him so by surprise he nearly dropped the dark-haired girl. “Don’t drop me.” Max smirked down at him as he slowly lowered her back down. “I’m so excited to get out of this house. I thought months with David would prepare me for living with him, I was wrong.” 

She got into the car first slipping into the middle seat in the back. “Hey Max! No hug for me?” Nikki asked practically vibrating in her seat. 

Max leaned in giving the green haired girl a hug, she noted the braids that Nikki’s hair had been put into, the girl was far more subdued in the city. “Sorry.” She said sheepishly and then looked up to the front seat. “Hey Mr. Walsh.” She said still unable to address Neil’s dad by anything other than his last name, for a moment she wondered if Neil’s mother would even accept Ms. Bishop as being formal enough when she met the woman.

“Hey Max.” Carl said with a caring smile from the front seat. “How are things going for you? Excited to go back to school?” He asked in the way that adults always asked about school or life.

“Things are okay sir. School will be interesting.” Max was trying to be polite to him for Neil.

The mall wasn’t very far from David’s house and she was sure if she wanted she probably could have walked there herself which was a bonus thought for after schools. “So Neil and Nikki have my card so if you kids need clothes feel free to put it on there okay? Within reason.” He added quickly.

Neil and Nikki nodded back at him, the boy’s expression was one of understanding. “Okay dad, thanks.” He said as they all climbed out of the car. “See you back here in four hours.” Neil added with a nod. 

The three turned and Max nervously took Neil’s hand steadying herself on his presence as they went in. They made their way through the mall slowly, first stop Max got herself some iced tea, it tasted like fuzzy peaches and she was more than happy with that.

When they walked past a bra store Nikki and Max stopped in quietly looking at the training bras, at one point Max had stopped to look longingly at one of the real bras and an elderly woman had caught her looking. 

“Don’t worry deary, someday you’ll need a bigger bra, you’re just a wee little las, even if they don’t grow that big boys will still like em.” The woman gave a little laugh as she left the store. “Boys these days so awkward.” She commented about Neil loudly as she walked passed him standing uncomfortably outside.

Max couldn’t help but laugh, every now and then for the rest of the day anytime Neil looked uncomfortable she would impersonate the little old lady, “Boys these days, so awkward,” and laugh. The comment though a weird one from a weird old lady, actually sort of brought comfort to Max and a little hope.

It was when they stopped for food in the food court that they had the most awkward run-in though.

“Max?” A woman’s voice sounded behind them and as they turned they found a young woman about the same age as David standing there.

“Aunty Charlotte?” Max looked stunned and just a little more than frightened, she hadn’t been expecting anyone to recognize her, especially not dressed as femininely as she was trying to be than in her yoga pants and cowl neck sweater. 

The woman’s lips turned into a frown as she looked on Max for a long moment of confusion. “Do you have a problem? Or something to say to my girlfriend?” Neil asked stepping up and taking Max’s hand proudly, this action paired with the words clicked in the womans head and understanding dawned on her face.

“Oh Max….” She said softly looking down at them. “I’m so sorry I had no idea…. Is this part of what happened with your parents?”

Max shook her head. “They never found out…. They don’t know.” She said heat rising adding a rosy tint to her topaz skin. “It was other stuff….”

She stepped forward and knelt down holding her arms out to the little girl. “Can I have a hug Max?” Max stepped forward and let herself be hugged, clearly trying to stay unemotional about that. “I’m so sorry Max, I had no idea…. I wish I had noticed that stuff, I’m so glad you’re okay… I’m going to give you my number okay? If you want to come celebrate Diwali with us you’re more then welcome Max okay? And you can bring your fosters too if you want.” She pulled out a pen and paper from her purse and wrote down her number as Max just nodded along numbly. “You look good Max, I’m really glad to see you happy.” She said tucking the note into the girl’s hand. “and it’s good to find you found yourself a good man.” Charlotte teased her gently causing Neil to blush still clearly confused.

“Was that your aunt?” Neil asked Max as the woman left.

Max shook her head a little. “No that’s Aunt Charlotte, she goes to the temple my parents used to worship at…. They haven’t been there in years but sometimes I would go… She’s just a family friend.”

It was clear Max didn’t want to talk about it any further and neither Nikki and Neil were stupid enough to push Max to talk about something she didn’t want to. So they changed subjects and went back to deciding on food. 

After food they spent their time dressing Neil, Max vetoed any turtlenecks and instead dressed Neil in clothes that he felt comfortable in and she found acceptable. Knit shirts, sweater’s over shirts, dark pants, cardigans, things that made Neil look intelligent but also stylish, it turned out Max had a bit of a knack for this. For Nikki, Max found stylish and adventurous stuff, a corduroy skirt, cowboy boots, jeans, fun t-shirts and plaids. For herself Max found edgy stuff, ripped jeans, oversized sweaters, cold shoulder shirts, a leather jacket, fishnets, a couple punky skirts and a couple bodysuits she liked. All things she felt comfortable in while packed. 

By the time they left she felt so comfortable, they had taken photos in the booth at the food court and left with clothes for school. She had good memories with Neil and Nikki outside of camp which was new but so good. She had never really had friends outside of camp until now, and all of this was so much better then she could have imagined.

“Hey Max would you like to sleep over tonight?” The invitation from Carl made her heart leap.

“Yes please sir!” she replied eagerly. “Let me just check in with my dads.” She texted David, who of course said it was okay and that he would drop some things off for her in a little bit. They stopped at the store on the way home and got a ton of snacks, discussing what movie they wanted to watch together that night.

Max was beyond excited for this.


	27. The Mummy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max, Niel and Niki watch movies in a pillow fort

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello Lovelies!  
> Long time no see!  
> as some of you may have seen on my Tumblr (writing-in-space) that I have been planning to come back for some time. originally this chapter was supposed to go up on the 7th of september but I fell ill with an awful flu. But I am feeling a lot better so expect regular updates once again. For information on my updates, notifications about new chapters and for some extra special content please check out my tumblr!   
> I hope you enjoy this chapter!

The first step to making a pillow fort in the Walsh household Neil told her, was deconstruction. Together the kids took apart the couch, the spare bed in the basement and the tv set up. Carl brought them copious piles of pillows and blankets, they lay the queen-sized mattress on the floor first, on one side they put the back of the couch, the other the box spring. From there they hung blankets and string lights Nikki had pilfered from the Christmas boxes still sitting in the basement hallway. They piled the bed with pillows and brought the Tv closer to the opening of the fort.

Max stretched out inside staring at the little lights hanging amongst the blankets in awe, she had never been in a pillow fort before, it was incredibly cool. “I want to live in a pillow fort forever.” She said to Neil when he came back with his laptop to connect to the TV. 

“Max we can’t live in a pillow fort.” He said with a little incredulous laugh as he settled in next to her.

“Well Maybe you can’t, but I can and fully intend to, and if you can’t support my pillow fort life I’m not sure we can date anymore Neil.” She teased softly tilting her head up to be able to look over at him grinning. 

Neil leaned down with a small smirk like he was going to kiss her but before their lips could meet, “Hey guys what are you doing?” Nikki bounced into the room and both kids shied away from one another, Max slightly hiding her face and Neil turning bright red.

“Hey Nik, we were just getting set up for the movie.” Neil fibbed turning back to his computer quickly, moving his hands in obviously fake motions on his computer that were enough to trick Nikki.

The other girl settled in, resting her head on her arms facing more away from Neil, she shifted however, just enough so that her hip was pressed against his thigh. “What kinds of movies do you like?” Max asked curiously.

They settled on a couple of adventure type movies, Indiana Jones was what Neil had called them and as the movies progressed she had shifted in against Neil close enough to feel him shake then things got rather scary. She couldn’t help the little smile on her face when he hid his face against her shoulder blade at the mummy and that’s when she decided she liked these movies.

…………….

“Scardy cat.” She whispered towards him and he was surprised by her tone, instead of that mocking tone Max always took there was no harshness to the words. There was a softness there that was almost unlike Max, or rather, perhaps, the Max that existed underneath all of that hardened from trauma exterior.

Affection. That was what he saw on her after the movie was finished and all that lit them was the backlight of a black screen. It was such a strange feeling, the one growing in his chest. Many times he had looked at her and felt that soft swell of warmth in his chest but this was deeper. This one felt like it went all the way through their lives and it caused him to completely lose all thought and breath in his lungs.

As a scientist he could never understand how someone could say the wind was knocked out of them by something emotional. He understood that if you got hit hard enough your lungs would compress and all the air would rush out, but scientifically he had never understood how thought could do the same thing. If he could form thoughts he would analyze it, figure out how it worked, but instead he just stared at her bright eyes, smiling at him through the darkness.

“Something on my face weirdo?” That same soft affection, nothing harsh, just a gentle teasing.

“I’m hoping your lips.” The words felt clunky in his mouth, far less smooth than he had hoped they would sound.

It still managed to elicit a snort from. “You’re a fucking nerd to you know that?”

Before he could analyze the curl of her lips and the way her voice pitched on those words, she was kissing him. It was different than before, longer and sloppier in some ways, but still good. 

When the kiss broke apart the sun-kissed girl rolled onto her back, pulling a blanket over to her and snuggling towards him. “Can we go to sleep now?” She asked with a deep yawn.

“Yeah.” He mumbled through his own yawn snuggling up next to her, it was only then that he remembered Niki was there too, noticing that she must have fallen asleep a long time ago. 

He settled in awkwardly beside Max, his nerves finally settling in. It took him a lot longer to fall asleep, once Max was asleep he lay anxiously watching her for most of the night.

Eventually sleep claimed him.


	28. Stay in School

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max has her first day back to school

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I missed last week, but here is an extra long chapter to make up for it! and remember these chapters will be coming out once a week from now on. for more info check out writing-in-space on tumblr!

The first day of school filled her with more dread than any other. 

“I’m going to be sick, I’m going to vomit into the back seat of this stupid fucking Kia and you’re going to have to deal with the smell of it for the rest of your lives. You could just homeschool me, it would be like camp but all year round and just you and me. See how great that sounds David? See how badly I don’t want to go to school today? I’m so desperate that I would willingly subject myself to 365 days of just you.” She lamented as they made their way through morning traffic. School was going to be just downright awful and she knew it, but somehow she couldn’t seem to make David see that.

David sighed in the front seat giving her a warm sympathetic smile in the rearview mirror. “I know kiddo, and you know that I 100% understand what you're going through right now. The struggle of whether or not you're passing or if they will accept you as you are. I get it.” He reached behind them as they were nearly at a standstill and let it hang there awkwardly for a moment, when she didn’t take it he gave her knee where he could reach a little squeeze. “If anything happens you tell me okay? And we will deal with it.”

She crossed her arms, damn him for being so understanding and reasonable, damn him for being able to calm her nerves so easily. 

Before he could take his hand back she grabbed it holding tightly too it putting all the fear and anxiety she felt into a tight squeeze and managed a; “thanks dad….” In a very soft voice.

She didn’t have to look up to feel the massive grin he was giving her, it radiated in the space like a small sun.

“It’s all gonna be okay kiddo.” He squeezed again and then put both hands back on the steering wheel.

___________________

He was right for the most part, no one at her new school really questioned anything about her existence and she went through most of the day unscathed until she reached 4th period French.

Max dreaded French. She could not understand French for the life of her, she thought that you could not find a language further from Hindi and more convoluted if you came up with one yourself, it was the worst.

This was only cemented in her mind when they got to roll call. 

“Maxwell Miller?” The crone’s voice drowned out, it was so nasally that Max was almost certain she was speaking out of her nose entirely. “Maxwell Miller?” She repeated, Max was so stunned, every other teacher had just called her Max, had gotten the notice that her name was in the process of being changed and that they should just call her Max to avoid problems.

Max didn’t respond.

The teacher got all the way through the names and didn’t even bother to ask if she had missed anyone. She turned her back to her students and it was a full ten minutes before she turned around, the board covered in conjugated French verbs.

“Are there any questions?” Her voice was more like it was coming from a tin can than a woman.

Max raised her hand.

“Ma’am. You missed me in roll call.” She said honestly and the class began to giggle, Max looked over to Neil in confusion but he didn’t seem anymore sure than she did.

“Well what is your name?” The French teacher waved her hand towards Max in an almost dismissive gesture that infuriated Max.

“Max Miller Ma’am.” She lifted her head and attempted some dignity.

The woman poked at her paper with so much disinterest that Max had to wonder why the woman even bothered to be here if she didn’t want to teach. “Child, I called your name and you simply did not answer, I have you marked as absent.” Her voice was set and it hit Max like a slap. “Maxwell Miller, Absent.”

“Well you see Ma’am I’m Maxine Miller, I think there may have been some kind of mix up.” She was trying so hard to be polite for David, and because she thought maybe it would draw less attention to her, but she could feel the flush of anger and embarrassment rising in her cheeks.

The teacher settled back leaning against the desk and studying Max with a disapproving expression. “I am quite certain that I did not get it wrong. I have a note here informing me of your…. Circumstance….” She drew the word out, her tone making it very clear her stance on that. “And your ridiculous Snowflake identity will not be humoured in this class like so many other soft teachers Maxwell. The fact of the matter is that you are Maxwell and not Maxine and I will treat you as such. If you asked me for a bathroom pass I would give you the male one, I will not play into such childish and ridiculous fantasies that your generation seem to have.” She tucked her greying hair behind her ear as if to make a point, as if saying she was older and so she knew everything.

Max didn’t remember getting up, but she did remember looking back at the classroom, and her own flipped desk as she left. “Well if you’re going to mark me absent I might as well not be here.” She stated, turning before the woman could say anything. 

Neil didn’t say a word as he caught up to her, just grabbed her hand and went with her as they snuck out one of the open doors, leaving the premises entirely.

She was flushed so hot that she was sure every inch of her skin burned with the humiliation that she felt. 

“She was a fucking asshole.” Neil whispered as they tumbled onto the grass, there was a hill between school and home, that overlooked a gorgeous lake. 

Max was not one for being small but right then she wanted to curl up and disappear. She pressed into his side, hiding her face in his neck and using him for protection from the world. To her the arms he wrapped around her felt like safety. “Swearing suits you.” She whispered to him, managing to pull a half grin from his gentle lips. It was only then that she could see just how mad he was, he rarely ever got mad, but he was so mad his cheeks were burning as much as she felt. 

“I’m going to fucking kill her the next time she pulls this shit.” He mumbled as he pressed his face into her curls with a small huff.

“You do that.” She replied closing her eyes, taking in the soft breeze and the calming world. “I’d like that.”

“You would?” Neil gently nudged her so that she could look up to his surprised face.

“Only if it’s you.” Max quickly hid her face again against his shoulder, there was a new heat growing in her cheeks and it was fueled by things like his gentle lips on her temple.

“Then for once I’ll be the one to stand up for you, in repayment for all the times you stood up for me.” 

She couldn’t really guess how long they laid there, as long as class would have gone at least because they only started to move once classmates started to pass and they didn’t want to be gawked at. 

Once up they did not say a word the entire way back to the Miller’s residence.


	29. "Thank you"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> David comes home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright so I am gearing up for NaNoWriMo so I will be stocking up on chapters and posting them over November, I won't be as active, but if you want to see how I am doing I may post some on my Tumblr (writing-in-space) on how I am doing.
> 
> But there still should be a chapter a week.
> 
> Alright guys see you in December!

“Max?” The voice came through her door preceding a soft knock, he was concerned, she could hear it in his voice plain as day. She had heard that concern so often as camp she had always mistaken it for pity and she hated that now, it had always been love hadn’t it?

Nonetheless she rolled further into her bed pulling her blanket up over her head, Neil was sitting on her desk chair spinning around doing nothing really at all. She appreciated having him there, instead of crowding her he decided to just sit there on his phone giving her some space. Now she heard him get up from the seat, opening the door with care, it wasn’t until after the door had closed again that she had realized they’d gone to the hall.

“Yeah David, I was there, it really happened.” She could hear them clear as day making her wonder just why they had left the room, she would never admit to anyone how much she appreciated it.

There was a long sigh and some shuffling. “I can’t believe that happened to her…” She could hear the despair in her father’s voice, when had she started to think of him as that? She couldn’t figure out when exactly DAVID had become DAD in her head anymore, but she supposed it didn’t matter.

She didn’t like the dread that dropped in her stomach when she heard the sound… it was so unnerving to hear him sound so broken, David was never anything other then happy right? She did this to him… 

No. 

It was that teacher that did that to him, if this was about her alone he wouldn’t be like this…

It was because she was upset.

He was upset because she was?

The thought felt so foreign to her. Never had anyone cared about her enough to be upset FOR her.

She slowly peeled the blanket back, it took more effort then she thought, it felt like it weighed more then the box of candy she and Dolph had sold to the other campers, all piled onto her. It took so much effort just to push her way up. 

Her legs felt like lead, but if David could get out of bed in the morning, she could get out of bed enough to interact with him.

She pushed the door open slowly, peering into the hallway. David was on the floor, leaning against the banister, his head in his hands while Neil had sat down against the wall across from him, both men looked like they were at a loss for words.

She thought about walking up, about saying something snarky about them looking like a bunch of depressed idiots. Instead she slipped out of the door and plopped down on the floor next to David. “I’m okay.” She said tugging at his sleeve trying to get his hand away from his face. “Hey idiot. I’m right here and I’m okay.” She put an edge to her words, trying to make the soft words have some bite. “David, common, It was shitty but I’m still here and I’m still fighting.

He finally brought his hands away from his face, one arm looping around her waist to pull her close, kissing the top of her head gently. “You’re right kiddo, I’m sorry, It’s just-“

“Don’t I’m not those other kids, I’m not going to go and end it all idiot. I like fucking pissing you off too much.” She mumbled softly against the side of his chest, taking in a deep breath of his scent, he smelled of cinnamon and earthen soap. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“I’m sorry.” Was all David could choke out, holding her tightly. “I’m going to have words with that woman.” He whispered. “This will get taken care of right now.” 

“धन्यवाद|” She whispered back.


	30. Tollerance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> David has a talk with the principal

Max was not allowed in the principal’s office while David and he talked, their conversation was too quiet to hear from the hall in entirety but she could tell from the tones of the voices that her father was peak pissed. She cringed when she heard his voice raise, she had very rarely heard it and it was almost always her fault, but this was different. This was not her being in trouble, this was almost murderous. She hadn’t thought he had that in him, let alone on her behalf.

“I want you to bring her in here right now and see what she has to say about the way she has acted!” David shouted, his hand slamming into the desk. “She harassed and discriminated against my daughter, how dare you try to tell me that it was probably a misunderstanding. Bring my daughter’s boyfriend and classmates in, they will tell you what went on and how she said it. My daughter had every right to fucking walk out of that classroom and not put up with the abuse her teacher was putting her through. An adult in a place of power should not be treating any fucking child like that.”

He was so loud she could hear him now, the swear words sounded so foreign on his lips, she was so used to things like heckin or fudge, so to hear him really, actually swear was terrifying.

“Now, now, Mr. Miller, really there is no need to get this heated, it was a simple mistake by an old school tea-“

“DON’T FUCKING OLD SCHOOL TEACHER ME. I,” there was a pause there, she assumed while he gathered his thoughts. “I have been in school with people older than her that get it easier than your fucking ‘old school’ teacher.” David hissed. “What you’re doing is making excuses for unacceptable behavior because you do not wish to deal with it. Well if you don’t we will take it over your head, and to the media.”

Even from the hallway the silence was deafening. 

There was some shuffling and then on the overhead system she heard the Madame being called to the office. 

She was stunned.

She sat there frozen.

David had made good on his word.

David was going to burn the world down if they didn’t accept her.

She was a little terrified of him at that moment if she were being honest and she was pretty sure her principal was too. But she was also really proud too, she had somehow come to trust him to protect her, however she had never expected this. 

It was a little awkward watching the Madame come storming down the hall and into the principal's office.

“You’re here to defend your Monstre?” She growled a little when she entered the room as if she had thought she would already win the fight.

David was ready to rip her head off right then and there. “YOU will not speak to my DAUGHTER that way, and you certainly will not speak about her like that either. What right do you think you have to say those things about my daughter? You are a teacher meant to teach her, not belittle her and treat her like she doesn’t deserve the respect of a human being.”

“If HE wants to go around pretending he is a little girl then that is fine, but he cannot honestly expect the mature adults in his life to continue to play along with this little farce!” she made an odd tsking sort of noise. “It’s not healthy for him, he must come back to reality, he is not some little princess he is a boy and he will be a man-“

“Now you fucking listen to me right now, you sit down and shut up.” David was utterly livid. “Being trans is not a choice, it is not a mental disease, it isn’t a farce, it isn’t a game. It is something that should be taken seriously. Madame would you tell me that I am nothing but a woman in disguise?” Max wished that she could see his face.

“Well no, Sir, you are very much not a woman-“

“But I, like Max, was born in the wrong body. I was born a woman and I am very obviously a man. Now either you shut up and learn to respect my daughter or I will have your job. And I can guarantee Madame that there are twenty more French teachers who would be willing to take your position in a heartbeat.” David came out of the office then and Max could see how red in the face her father was. “And you sir better get your staff together and teach them a thing or two about tolerance or I will still be going to the school board.”

David came over and gently took Max’s hand. “Let’s go.”


	31. Losing My Religion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> David gets an important phone call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Researching this has been so fascinating and I can't wait to continue this story.
> 
> My life has been crazy up until now but hopefully, I will be able to get back on track soon on my writing.
> 
> If you are Hindu or speak Hindi and at any point post something incorrect, do not be afraid to tell me. I am an outsider merely doing research so I can't truly know what I'm doing.

Max had not spoken about religion the entire time that David had known her, not once had she ever indicated being apart of any particular faith, so when the phone rang he did not expect the conversation that followed.

“सुप्रभात” Came the voice of a woman, she sounded older and the language she spoke was lost on David. “Is this David Miller?” 

The mention of his name shook David out of his trance. “This is he.” He realized afterwards that the way he was speaking was rather rude.

“You are the one with our little Max?” he recognized the accent of the woman to be of the same dialect that Max had been known to occasionally use.

He sounded sceptical and also protective when he responded. “That depends on what you mean when you say our?”

“मुझे क्षमा कीजिये” The woman said another foreign phrase leaving David a little confused. “I am sorry, I am Anika, I am Pujari.” She explained, though this did not seem to help the situation. “I am a priestess of the Hindu religion as you might say….” 

Was Max Hindu? Why had she never mentioned it? “That doesn’t explain who you are to Max…”

“I have known Max since she was a little baby.” The woman’s use of the female pronouns for Max seemed to surprise David a fair bit since he was certain Max had never been out before. “Dear Charlotte saw Max at the mall the other day and told us that Max is Hijra… I cannot say I am surprised… He was always a very quiet and reserved child.” 

The past tense use of the male pronouns made David a little uncomfortable but he wasn’t sure if it would be overstepping to say anything, he decided it would be better to. “First of all, Max is a girl and uses female pronouns-“ David began, the woman, Anika, interrupting him.

“Sorry, Yes but when she was little she was a he, I did not mean to offend.” She said it so matter of factly that David felt it was best not to press the issue.

“Secondly… what is a Hijra?” David pushed on.

There was a soft laugh from the other line. “Max does not speak of religion with you, does she?” the woman asked, this managed to bring a flush to David’s cheeks, making him feel like an ignorant child. “This is okay, she does not talk much of personal things. Hijra are of the third gender, as you say they can be transgender or intersex and everything in between. They are both seen as a blessing and a curse. Where the Hijra are is lucky and special, but because of influences on our society they were pushed to the edges of our community and still persecuted because of the English religion’s influence in our country. Some of us are working to fix that though.”

This made David’s breath hitch, there were people in her community that wanted Max to still be apart of it? “You wish to see Max?”

“I was hoping maybe we could do something very special for Max.” Anika said in the most wise and grandmotherly tone that David was pretty sure he had ever heard. “When girls hit puberty in our religion they have a Saree Ceremony to celebrate, I have talked to others and we wish to hold one for Max.”

David could feel the tears, he was trying so hard to keep his cool but he was certain the woman could hear his desperated attempt at sniffling away his tears on the other line. “W-what do you need me to do?” 

“Hold your tears for seeing our little girl in her first Saree, if you cry before she will suspect something.” The woman laughed, but not in a judgemental way, more in a soft and caring sort of way. “Bring Max to our temple this weekend, make an excuse and bring her to us. She will be safe, I promise you, with us. But we would like you to come and be apart of it as well if that is what you are comfortable with. We hear that Max has a young suitor as well,” Anika paused, her voice with amusement and care. “If you could convince he and his family to come as well, they will be more than welcome. Those who are important in Maxine’s life.”

“My mother?” He wondered outloud.

“The more the merrier dear, come and enjoy. Tell your women to come early and we will dress them up in Saree’s of their own if they wish.” David was trying to keep from choking up again.

“Miss Anika, I am very grateful for this call today.” David could feel his voice break as he spoke.

This seemed to surprise the Pujari, she laughed a little. “Little girls and boys often loose their religion and their community when they are adopted, we wish to avoid that if we can.”

“I didn’t want her to lose that… but if her parents… she was so afraid her parents would kill her if she admitted to being a girl to them, and so we were a little afraid of reaching out to anyone within the Indian immigrant community. We were looking to try and find someone within the queer community that was Indian but it wasn’t an easy search…” he decided not to lament the entire quest to the woman. “I’m just so glad that she will have you and your community joining her support system. She needs people around her right now… it’s not been easy.”

“I’m glad that you did not hang up the phone on me David, we will be so happy to have you and yours in our temple. Saturday at 2 is when you should bring her, but others should arrive as early as 12 to help us set up.” There was so much joy in David’s heart when they said their goodbyes and the phone was hung up. 

Max was not losing her entire community and for that David was over the moon. He could not wait to share this with Jasper and Gwen, he couldn’t wait to invite his mother or the Walsh’s, this was going to be an event that he was going to want to remember and for Max to remember for the rest of their lives.

The next couple hours were spent calling around and talking to others, inviting the most important people.

Saturday could not come soon enough.


	32. All Wrapped Up and Beautiful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max's support system grows and strengthens

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As an outsider, I do not think I could accurately capture this part from Max's perspective so for this event and other Hindu ones I may cover. they will be written in other's perspectives. I want to do this part justice but I also don't think I could even begin to try to put myself in anyone's shoes.
> 
> If anything is wrong or off about anything I write in relation to Hinduism or Indian traditions PLEASE TELL ME RIGHT AWAY I will change it

Neil gently tugged at the collar, Max had been making him wear collared shirts under his sweaters and though he could admit that it looked better he hadn’t gotten used to the feeling. On the bright side he no longer looked like his nerdy philosophy professor of a father and he looked a little like maybe he was going to the same place Max was half the time. Today he had opted a bright purple sweater like their favourite podcast over a dark grey button-up and on the bottom were some nice jeans, Candy told him if he couldn’t wear ripped jeans to their temple then he wasn’t allowed to wear ripped jeans to Max’s temple either. He could respect that. 

When they first arrived at the temple they were greeted by Anika and a couple other member’s of the community and given directions to a smaller community center down the road where the actual event would be happening. Neil had been surprised when they were actually greeted with Namaste, he had started to think that it was just a word used by weird white yoga people as some bullshit hokey thing. Now he knew that it was actually a greeting in another language.

When they arrived at the little community center, Neil found the inside felt a lot bigger than it looked on the outside, they were put to the task of helping set up and decorate with lights and colorful decorations. Everyone kept coming to ask Neil questions, about himself and about Max and, most uncomfortable of all, their relationship. He felt like he was on the bachelorette, the way that he was being treated, if he hadn’t felt so strongly about Max or as comfortable in his relationship with her, he might have been completely intimidated out of it. 

A lot of the people that he met would introduce themselves as Max’s aunty’s or uncles and this left Neil a little confused until Anika reminded him that they were just adults in the community that saw themselves as apart of Max’s life. People Max herself would probably call by those titles when she arrived.

Anika was especially interested in Neil, he had been asked about his faith, questioned about whether he intended to have kids someday, what he wanted to be when he grew up. She nodded but never gave much feedback and Neil just hoped that it was acceptable. He supposed if he had been in Max’s life properly up to this point then perhaps they would already know all this stuff about him from her. Or perhaps they would be just as inquisitive and questioning but drawn out over more time.

The women had kidnapped Nikki and Candy when they had first gotten there, dressing them up in Saree and half Saree he was told, as Candy was now married to his father and Nikki was still just a kid. Neil had a lot of questions, and found it very surprising that the Saree was actually just one very long sheet of silk. There was a lot of intricate designs and patterns to each, and even he had to admit just how beautiful they were, he wasn’t sure he was going to survive when he saw Max in her’s. 

They were just finishing up decorating when Anika came to find him, she told him that David, Jasper and Max had just been sent this way from the temple, the diversion had been set up on purpose. He was invited along with David’s mother who Neil hadn’t even notice arrive. The older woman was dressed up and wore bangles like the Indian women around, though unlike Candy and Nikki, these bangles looked like they belonged to the woman. 

Together the three of them went out to the front entrance, stepping outside just as the Kia Sedan pulled up, Max was hesitant to come out until they locked eyes. 

“What the shit is going on?” Max asked aloud as she slipped out of the Sedan.

Neil could tell by the sound of her voice and tone that she was scared, that she was afraid of what was about to happen and was covering it with curse words and snark. “Hey Max…” He said with a small grin, blushing just a little bit, she always caught him off guard these days, she was dressed so plainly, clearly not expecting to be at an event with people. 

“Max.” Anika said very cautiously.

Max seemed to go quiet and more respectful than Neil had seen her in a long time. “Anika, I’m sorry… I didn’t mean for the language-“

the woman held up her hand, smiling, she shook her head at the little girl. “I understand that it might be very scary to be here, but we wanted to show you that your parents,” here she paused to look and smile at the two men hovering protectively over the little sun-kissed girl before continuing. “your biological parents are not apart of our community, you are.” She said very softly, and here the woman leaned on Neil without warning to help herself crouch down closer to her height. “You are a precious part of our community that we do not wish to lose Max. Your family and your friends, and your lovely boy here have been decorating with us for a while, they have been real troopers.”

“What are they decorating for?” There was a small tremor in her voice, taking a shaky step closer she let Anika take her hand and draw her in closer.

Anika gently patted her hand in comfort. “Well you are a young girl of a certain age, It’s about time you wore your first Saree.” 

Max was trembling physically, more overwhelmed with emotion then anyone in the group had ever seen her, and allowing herself to be overwhelmed instead of just shutting down. Tears began to roll down her cheeks, she sniffled rubbing at her face with the sleeve of her oversized sweater. “You really mean that?” She hiccuped. “Thank you.” She whispered so softly. 

Neil wanted to hug her, but in all his research of the Hindu he had determined that perhaps it was best if he didn’t right then, instead he let her hug Anika and then David, Jasper and Yvette for comfort. Neil managed to share a warm and meaningful smile with her before she went off with Yvette and Anika to get dressed up. Somewhere along the way they picked up Nikki because as he entered the building he could hear her energetic rambling further off about how she was so excited for Max and talking about her own half Saree. 

“It looks amazing.” Jasper commented standing next to Neil watching as David trailed nervously after the women.

“It took a lot of work.” Neil laughed awkwardly, he was so far out of the realm of comfort, but he wanted to be here more than anything for Max. 

Jasper nodded with great approval. “It means a lot to us that you and your family could come.” 

And in truth it meant a lot to Neil to get to be there. “If this is how big they go for coming of age…. I’m a little afraid to ask about weddings, or even research…”

“It goes for days.” Jasper said honestly to the young boy. 

“Days?” The curly haired teen echoed.

“Days.” The curly haired man reaffirmed.

The boy’s Adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed his anxiety. “Maybe we could have a Jewish-“

“Max’s community wouldn’t let that happen.” Jasper grinned at the kid, making Neil flush. “I’m sure when the time comes you two will figure it out, and it will be something that you will enjoy as adults.”

“It’s a long way away Mr. MacIntosh.” Neil said quickly, a question he had been fielding all day.

“Good.” The protective father said almost too quickly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for more info on my fanfic's and other works come over to my tumblr writing-in-space


	33. Bangles and Baubles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max's coming of age party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! The third weekday in a row posting say WHAT
> 
> Today is my first appointment for hormones and I'm super excited.
> 
> As part of my excitement for that and for 300 kudos on this fic in the next little bit, I have posted a contest up on my Tumblr. 
> 
> the Tumblr is writing-in-space and the contest consists of a One shot of your choice written with the characters of Different can be better. Details are on the Tumblr post, the contest opened on Saturday and is open until next Saturday.

Neil had not gotten a chance to look at the community center as a whole, the main space was very large and he had been placed in a corner to work on one small part. Now as he walked in he got to get a good look at the space. The walls were draped in fabrics and fake flowers woven together, the floor had been covered in a rug that had been designed for head such occasions and was in four parts. Chairs were set up all around but the big throne that was up on a stage surrounded by lights and colours was the most striking. Max would be sitting up there in a couple of hours receiving gifts and seeing people that she hadn’t in over 6 months.

 

And she would be respected by her community as a young woman. Something Neil very well knew was not something she ever thought would happen. Right now Max was somewhere out back being dressed in colourful silks and being drawn on with henna, he wondered if she was doing okay. He wondered when the time came and guests actually started arriving if a lot of people would show up and if they would be respectful.

 

 

There were a lot of people by the time that Max came out, mostly women, all bearing gifts. It reminded him a lot of his bar mitzvah last year, but this was more colourful.

 

When Max finally came out, Neil felt like he was going to die of boredom, he’d been playing on his phone and generally trying to avoid more questions, he knew it was probably rude but they were still waiting for the event to even start right? He looked up as people seemed to be full of excitement.

 

She was wearing bright blues, yellows, and golds, all of which had always complimented her so completely. He was taken away by the beauty of her, the golden jewelry that she seems to adorn all over, making glittery sounds as she moved. She looked so full of energy that Neil could hardly believe she was the same girl. Her hair and been braided back with more flowers and swung when she turned. Her family flowed like a light that she basked in as they all got settled. Neil wondered what the bananas were about.

 

It felt like moments in a matter of hours, watching as everybody went up and greeted Max, dumping what looked to him from where he sat like flower petals and grains on her head, something she seemed to take gratefully. A lot of the presents she was given were clothes, pretty, cute, trendy, traditional, she got saree and western clothes, jewelry like she was wearing, and expensive western stuff. She got bags and backpacks, things she would need for school, more practical stuff, as well as money and books.

 

Neil could tell that with each gift she was given she was further humbled, they had spoken a little before about community, enough for Neil to know that she had never expected this from them. She didn’t expect anything from them.

 

When they were finally getting toward the end, Neil hadn’t realized just how many Indian people lived in this region let alone in this country, he was starting to think David and Jasper were going to have to rent a bigger house just for Max.

 

The last gift given to Max was the final surprise, something no one that was newer to Max’s life knew about. Her little sister.

 

After everything had been said and done it turned out, Max’s little sister had ended up in foster care without anyone notifying David or Jasper, perhaps out of worry of taking her out of her culture.

 

Neil had never seen Max cry so hard as when hugging the younger girl. This made a lot of people in the room, especially David and Jasper, cry.

 

Eventually, there was some food and dancing, but after that, the night was mostly a blur of warm feelings, delicious spices, and music. Neil was happy to have been there, but he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t happy to be in his bed at the end of the long day, quietly texting with Max.

 

 

  
  
Neil lay there flipping through the photos he had taken that day, looking at the expressions on her face, more emotions than he had ever seen the girl express. It filled his chest with warmth to see the way her face shifted and crinkled with laughs and smiles.   
  
He wanted to liquify the feeling in his chest and keep it forever if he could recreate it and sell it in soda’s he could make millions.   
  
Tomorrow he would ask his father to go to the grocery store and print some of his photos off to put up on his wall. He continued flipping through the photos until he passed out staring at her face.


	34. With Family and Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max explores her developing relationships through modern social media

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a longer chapter written while I was procrastinating.
> 
> Sorry that there weren't any chapters at the end of last week, some shit went down in my life, I had to quit my job, it sucked. 
> 
> Don't forget to check out my blog on Tumblr Writing-in-space
> 
> Anyways, Enjoy!

“Max is this song really popular again? What year are we in?” David asked as he stood poised for the camera, one leg out to the side as the early 2000’s bop started.  
  
_I told the witch doctor I was in love with you,_  
  
“Dad just go along with it.” She hissed as he folded his leg on the beat.  
  
_I told the witch doctor I was in love with you,_  
  
David obliged the teenage girl switching legs on the next beat.  
  
_And then the witch doctor he told me what to do._  
  
He told me…  
  
A David repeated the motion much faster this time following what Max had taught him to the beat of the song he watched her roll over silently giggling. He couldn’t help but smile, glad to see her enjoying herself, if this made her happy he would do it a thousand times over.  
  
When she picked up her phone and walked away she added it to her TikTok profile with a little smile as her Dad joined the couple other videos she had there. This was one of those fond memories Max would hold stead fastly too, but would never tell a soul how much it meant to her.  
  
_____________  
  
A few days later when Yvette was over Max got her to dance together in the kitchen, the song started off very classical, and the two moved side by side swaying to the music.  
  
But then it changed, lyrics started and almost immediately Yvette was screaming and Max was doubled over in laughter.  
  
_all you ladies pop your pussy like this._  
  
“IS THIS WHAT YOU KIDS LISTEN TO NOW A DAYS? DAVID HAVE YOU HEARD THIS.” Could be heard over the music in the video before Max ended it, once again adding it to her profile. She watched it back once before she hurried out the back door, flipping over the railing of the deck and vaulting her way down and away from the house to avoid David for a bit.  
  
___________  
  
“Okay so we touch ankles like this?” Jasper held up and out his foot to the girl which she copied, nodding.  
  
They repeated that motion before switching sides a couple times, when they finally got the spinning around part down they were both breathless and laughing. “Ready?” She asked, grinning ear to ear.  
  
“I think as ready as I’m ever going to be.” He was being honest with her as she set up the camera on the floor for them.  
  
_oh nanana oh nanana oh nana oh nana oh nanana_  
  
It had taken them all afternoon while David was out to learn, another sweet memory added to her profile, another smile on her face as she showed her father the videos she had made so far. “Is this why you climbed off the deck the other night?” He asked with a laugh when Max showed him the video with Yvette.  
  
“Yeah… I didn’t really want to face David.” She admitted, making them both laugh again, he grabbed her into a side hug and kissed the mess of curls on her head.  
  
“You’re a good kid Max, these are really good, I’m glad to see you so confident in yourself.” Those words filled her with warmth in her chest, she had finally found home, truly.  
  
Of course that meant she had to shove him off her. “fuck off.” She said quickly hiding her grin as she launched back up the stairs to her room.  
  
____________  
  
“Hey Nikki?” Max called to her friend curiously when class let out at the end of the day.  
  
Nikki ran over with more energy than Max ever thought she could have herself. “Yeah Max?”  
  
“Will you help me with this TikTok?” She was nervous about admitting to her friends outside of Neil that she had an account, people could be weird about it.  
  
Nikki looked over the moon about being asked to do something though, so that put Max’s anxiety to rest a little.  
  
“Okay can you run up to me for this one?” Max asked shooing Nikki off, the green haired girl following the instruction.  
  
_life is a wonder._  
  
Nikki mouthed the words as she ran up to Max again.  
  
_You’ll never know the answer._  
  
Max flipped the camera around to herself for this line mouthing the words with a nihilistic expression on her face.  
  
_Nature is a Miracle._  
  
The camera flipped around to Nikki as she dropped to the ground pointing at a tuft of grass growing up through the concrete.  
  
_Natural disasters._  
  
Max flipped the camera back to her face, angling it down trying to give herself the most menace.  
  
_It’s good to be alive._  
  
Nikki was looking up at Max with just as much energy as she usually did.  
  
_you could wake up with cancer._  
  
she looked reasonable and flippant this time the camera flipped to her.  
  
_But I’m healthy…_  
  
Nikki looked very dejected this time as they began to walk home.  
  
_Healthy people still get cancer._  
  
Max was standing outside her house when she said this line.  
  
_I love this show._  
  
Nikki was sitting on the couch for that shot.  
  
_It’s the last episode._  
  
Max leaned in behind Nikki holding up the final season of Gravity falls on DVD.  
  
_The sun is shining._  
  
They cut to Nikki staring out the window with wonder.  
  
_It’s going to explode._  
  
Max was looking at Nikki was destruction on her face.  
  
_Every species is beautiful and unique._  
  
 The last shot they saved for when they took Nikki home, there was a shot of her being attacked by her cat viciously as she said this, cooing over the animal.  
  
In between they had watched more of gravity falls, David had gotten them the box set, and though Max wouldn’t admit to it she really did love the show. When they said goodbye and Max went back home, she added the video to her channel, another afternoon of memories she would keep forever.  
  
_________  
  
“Hey Neil!” She called from the front seat, her camera angled so that both she and Neil who was sitting behind her was visible on the screen.  
  
“Yeah babe?” He asked looking up at her with a rather startled expression.  
  
This made her blush, but she continued on. “Bet you I can make you say 5.”  
  
“Alright I guess I’ll take that bet…” Neil looked weary and unsure of what was about to come.  
  
She was lucky that he only ever watched videos on the app with her, or else he may have seen this one. “What’s three plus three?” she asked.  
  
“Six?” Neil was very hesitant in his reply clearly trying to figure out the trick.  
  
She cocked her hips, placing one hand on them and smirking her lips to the side. “see I told you I could make you say 6.”  
  
“No you said you could make me say five…. Damnit Max.” He frowned for a moment before he started laughing, his laugh infecting her a little as she giggled as well.  
  
Adding it to her TikTok she looked at the gathering of memories she now had on the app.  
  
_________  
  
Another evening Max spent three hours setting up little green alien toys across every surface on the main floor with a big blow up one standing alone on the table. The trio had to work very carefully from one end of the floor to the other, laughing any time someone got stuck.  
  
The dedication and work that went into doing it was more than she had put into any of her other videos. When they were done the camera started at an angle that only saw the big blow up alien.  
  
_Never mind I’ll find…._  
  
The camera panned out to all their hard work, all but one alien facing forward.  
  
_Someone like you!_  
  
They then spent twenty minutes kicking and sweeping, sheer destruction of all their hard work, laughing just as much as putting it together. After that they spent the evening alone watching movies while David and Jasper were out for date night. Her Tik Tok post was accompanied with an Instagram post of the three of them on the couch.  
  
______  
  
Max even dragged Anya into it when she was visiting one day with them. While the social worker was talking with David and Jasper about something the two girls went to Max’s room where they went to watch stuff.  
  
Max paused the tv and talked the 9-year-old into doing the video with her.  
  
She set the phone on recording across from the bed, the song wonderland by caravan palace playing as they did the pose challenge, mockingly fighting over the remote while almost pulsing to the beat as they moved.  
  
Afterward the 9-year-old admitted that it was a lot of fun and they giggled playing it back once Max had added it to her page.  
______  
  
Her favourite TikTok though was the one she did with Neil, nestled up in the blankets and Pillows of the bed they gently high fived back and forth. They fist bumped to the beat before bringing their hands up together. Sliding them gently down to point towards one another before slowly pulling back, shifting so only two fingers were out waiting for the moment. Then they moved their top fingers in a cocking motion with the sound of the music before finishing off with a shooting motion.  
  
It was such a small and simple thing, but it seemed so intimate every time she watched it, they so perfectly mirrored one another’s motions. She liked doing little things like this with him.  
  
Her collection of little videos with her friends and family made her feel comfortable, secure even in their relationships. A feeling she had never really experienced before.


End file.
